*Snap*

✾

June 10, 10:00 am
I see her. I see her everywhere. In all the rooms of the new house. I've been seeing her for a week now, ever since we moved in here. This house feels great, it feels homely. The first time I saw her, she was hiding behind a tree, watching dad take our stuff inside. Bent, wrinkly and frail, with a long curved nose and hollow sunken eyes, devoid of any emotion. She kept staring intensely, as if right into my soul. I watched her staring as my mum wheeled me inside. I've been crippled my entire life, 15 years. I'm also deaf-mute. I never once broke eye contact as I was wheeled inside. She snapped her neck and smiled, but never once broke the eye contact too. Something told me I was gonna see more of her...

June 10, 1:00 pm
The second time I saw her, she was sitting on the big armchair. Staring, the same as before. I noticed only I could see her. My parents wouldn't believe me if I told them about her. They are sick of me, I am a disappointment, a liability. They'd kill me the first chance they get. All I got from them was food and disgusted looks. She snapped her neck again, with a smile. I kept it to myself. I kept staring back...

June 17, 9:00 am
She talks to me sometimes these days, writes on a paper for me to read and I write back. She tells me about herself. It's like she's my friend now, my only friend. She told me this house belonged to her. It was taken from her by force, how bad she was treated, because she was crippled too. And deaf-mute. Yesterday, she told me how she hates everyone who buys the house. How much she hates my parents. I told her I hate them too. She smiled. I asked her if she hates me too. 'No sweetie, you're special' she wrote, and snapped her neck. I kept it to myself...

June 19, 8:00 pm
I talked to her about my parents. How much they hate me and how much I hate them. I told her how they wish I was never born, how they wish I died. 'You don't deserve them' she wrote, 'they deserve to die'. And I couldn't disagree...

June 23, 9:00 pm
She's my best friend. She's just like me, she understands me. I can joke with her, I can share everything. I noticed she snaps her neck a lot. She told me she wants her house back all to herself. We're mostly alone in the house while my parents go to work. She seems happier then and so do I. She tells me all about it. How it was when she lived here, how it was taken from her. I don't like hearing about how it was taken. It angers me. Something in me snaps. I like talking to her so much. She listens to me cry, she tells me my parents aren't worth it. She says she can help me and I wanna believe her. I think I will...

June 27, 6:00 pm
She hasn't been visiting a lot since the last 2 days. But I still feel her, I feel her presence around me. I miss her so much. Ever since I told her I need her help, she's maintaining distance, but I feel her all the time. What's happening? I think she hates me too now, like everyone else. She's sick of me too. I should've known...

July 2, 11:00 am
I'm scared. I think I killed a bird today. It hopped into my room from the window above my bed. I was angry at my mom. She cursed at me, told me I disgust her. She told me she never considered me her daughter. She thinks I don't understand but I can read her lips. I suddenly felt the old lady, again. I couldn't see her. But I felt all of her. I got angrier, I saw red. My mom went out and I grabbed the bird, and squeezed. Everything went black...

July 2, 2:00 pm
I woke up a few minutes back. I was still on my bed, I think I had fainted. Mom obviously didn't come to check on me. I saw blood all over my hand, and feathers. But I couldn't see the bird anywhere. I was confused, I felt weird. Her presence was gone. I struggled into my wheelchair, wheeled myself to the basin, and washed my hands. Something feels different...

July 4, 6:00 pm
She came to visit me today. I was so happy. She smiled at me and I felt great. I told her about the day before. About the bird. I asked her what it could've meant. She smiled, but didn't reply. She just snapped her neck, and was gone...

July 5, 6:00 pm
I feel weird. I don't feel like myself. I killed a rat today the same way as the bird. Except, this time it was because of my dad. I hate my parents. I hate them, hate them, hate them. I want to kill them...

July 5, 9:00 pm
It's all very weird. I don't know why I wrote that a few hours back. I didn't want to. But a part of me wanted to. I don't feel like myself but I do. I've stopped feeling her presence too. Something is different, I think I'm all alone again. I think she's gone...

July 6, 9:00 am
I have the urge to kill, I wanna kill. I need to see blood. I wanna do something. But I don't know why, and I don't know what...

July 7, 2:00 pm
Today I fought with my parents again. They're such idiots. They don't understand what they're doing. Somehow I understand what I'm gonna do, but I don't...

July 8, 8:00 am
Today feels like it'd be the best day ever. I don't know why, but I woke up smiling. I feel like I know what I'm gonna do, but I don't...

July 8, 10:00 am
I'm sitting on my wheelchair. I feel light, I can feel it. My parents are at home today. Something's going to happen, I know it. But I don't know what...

July 8, 12 noon
I feel strong suddenly. I feel like a part of me is coming out of me. But I feel stronger. Something's gonna happen soon...

July 8, 2:00 pm
I feel restless but I feel strong. I think I know what it is, but I'm not sure...

July 8, 3:50 pm
Hatred. Pure hatred is what I'm feeling right now. Still strong as ever. My parents were cursing at me again. I could read those lips. I wanna rip their tongues off, I wanna do something. It's crossing the limit. I feel like I'll do something...

July 8, 4:02 pm
I see it. I see my parents, begging. I see their face. Their eyes wide open. Their lips moving, begging so much. Fear in those eyes. Those eyes, which never showed love for me. Which only flashed hate when I looked into them. Fear. I love it. But I'm here. I don't understand. I'm writing what I see. I see myself laughing. I lean over them, standing over them. They're surprised how I could get up. But I'm here, I see myself as I write. I realise, there's two of me. I see the other me laugh harder. I'm still watching the other me, whose eyes flash red. I see it, I hear the screams. They sound like music to my ears. I see my parents laying on the floor. Dead. And the other me stands over them. I see her look so proud, her hands covered in blood again. I see her look into the mirror. I think know what she can see there...

July 8, 4:04 pm
I can feel myself smile as I write this, feeling so happy. My hands, holding the pen, covered in blood. I look back at the other me, still in front of the mirror. She turns to me. We look the same but not quite. She's bent, wrinkly and frail, with a long curved nose and hollow sunken eyes, devoid of any emotions. She looks like the old lady. She smiles at me, I smile back. I can see her right in front of me. The old lady. But I don't feel her. I just feel myself, but stronger, stronger than ever. I guess I am special like she told me. She stares at me intensely, as if right into my soul. I stare back. She smiles again, and snaps her neck and I feel my neck snapping. I now finally understand, everything finally makes sense. I think I knew it for quite a while. We both start laughing. I feel great, I understand everything. I guess now it's safe to say, I finally got my house back...