Just Friends | ✓

chapter 16

Ammaa, the way everyone made me feel like a little bub 🤧🤧. I love you all so much. Itnnaaa saara<3! 
Also, this is mere fiction , dill pr mat Lena kuchh bhi 😘
Happy reading 💕
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"Shehnaaz" his voice echoes in my head and it pains. It pains a lot.

Sidharth comes to me taking baby steps looking tired. There were bags under his eyes too. With each step he took, our proximity increased, and my breathing turned shallow. Not in a good way.

My chest is heaving up and down and I want to scream my lungs out like I did seconds before , fist my hair and scratch every ounce of skin off my body.

Anxiety is bubbling inside me like boiling kettle . Fighting to get out. I want to gasp for air, struggle to breath. But instead , I don't breathe at all.

Guilt courses it way back into my veins. I hurt his mother. I hurt him by putting tabasco sauce in pasta .

By almost killing Rita aunty.

Oh my God, what do I do?

"Shehnaaz'' Sidharth says again but I don't look at him. I focus on a non existent bug on my bedsheet and pull my legs up, hugging my knees.

Is he here to file a case against me? Or hand me to police.

No please no. I don't want to go anywhere. I want to stay here. Alone.

"We're going shehnaaz, I'm packing bags" Sidharth says coolly. I snap my head towards him and almost break it in the process.

" What?" I say a little too loudly but the prospect of going out is horrifying. I can't meet people.

"The contract shehnaaz, the contract. We signed it during the lockdown, the shoot was postponed. remember? They've been trying to contact you since ages but kaushal's been denying them. You can't say no to the second half of the contract. We need to be professional" he explains and I Bob my head up and down when in reality I don't understand a single thing.

I'm stuck at the fact that he's there in my room when nobody could come in. I know I can kick his ass out because it is my property.

But I don't.

He's putting my clothes in a huge bag talking randomly about things I don't register. I gather courage to ask him about Rita Aunty, if she's fine now? Or may be I just want to know whether I've killed her or not.

I don't want to be a murderer.

The thought makes tears prickle in my eyes . He turns around suddenly, almost collapsing himself on me but he's swift. He steadies himself and out of the blue I feel conscious. His deep eyes scanning me , giving me a once over and I see a flicker of an unknown emotions in them. It's almost like he can see through my body. Of the loud thoughts that thump in my head and fill my heart.

I flinch.

I flinch when he touches me ever too softly to tuck the strand of hair that tickled my face.

My face. Oh my God. What if he knows ?

Pills , I need them. I need them before I lose my mind and start screaming. Again.

"Where are we going?" I ask despite of everything going inside me.

"Kerala"

Out of Bombay? That means flight.
Flight means airport and airport means people.

Hell no. 

"NO" I shout at him.

The damage is done. The dam is breaking.

"NOO. I AM NOT GOING ANYWHERE. I DON'T GIVE A F**K ABOUT ANYTHING" I scream shivering, throwing the duvet and pillows that were kept on the bed.

I am pulling my hair with all the force I have throw away the empty thoughts that reside there. I don't know what he's doing and I don't care. Bile is rising in my stomach , it's churning too fast.

His firm grip on my arms stops me from doing further damage to my head. And I still.

He's touching me.

He shouldn't.

I yank away from his touch. My eyes must look wild because I have absolutely no sense of anything.

"Ughhh" I whimper.

"Sheh..naaz" he says. His voice is cracking a little.

" It's okay shehnaaz. Breathe" he catches me yet again.

" Breathe baby" and I do. 

Inhale

Exhale

Repeat.

And I cry. Second time after that week. First was in front of Sharu.

Sharu, I need her. She'll tell me what I should do and what I should not. As much as her pretty face and serene smile creeps me , I know she's good at heart. I'll beg her . I'll beg her to put something. Anything in my body that will relax the shit going inside me.

His warmth floods me as dizziness takes over.

"Shhh..breathe" he coos and lulls me to sleep.

I'm too tired to fight. I let unconsciousness prevail.

Do I still have to go to Kerala? Is the last thought I have before my eyelids falls shut.
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The response on last chapter was so overwhelming, I felt like crying literally. Do tell me how this one was.
Also, every story has two sides. Just because sidharth's perspective isn't in the picture, doesn't mean he's bad.

Love,
Kriz