~sweet pea~ j.m

~chapter three~

A/N if you want to get properly in the feels listen to the song "you were good to me" by Jeremy Zucker on repeat. That's what I did whilst writing this and I must say I teared up a bit haha. Enjoy :)

The aftermath...
It was the next day since my parents died. I was still in the kitchen I didn't move since yesterday when I was cleaning my wrists. I couldn't sleep. I just sat on the counter all night thinking. I couldn't get the image of those bullets going straight through my parents. The moment when their bodies hit the ground it was like everything was in slow motion and I was helpless.

That moment was replaying through my mind all night. I blamed myself for what happened I felt shit about the fact that I didn't do anything. If I just didn't freeze up on the stairs I could've saved them. I could've done something. Anything. It was my fault and now I had to deal with that for the rest of my life. I let my parents die in front of me.

I thought about the fact that DCS was probably going to come after me and my sister as we are both underage and have no adult with us, but as no one really knew us around here because we were new and didn't go out, so I thought that'd give us at least a month or two to stay out of their trouble and keep on living here before they find out.

People probably now knew us as the new girls with dead parents but I guess no one knew that they were our parents because we never stepped outside into the ambulance so they would've only seen the dead bodies. At least that's one good thing. We were still un noticed.

I also planned to get a job now that we have no money. Like I mean no money. My parents didn't have a secret safe or anything like that. All I could find was the money and credit cards in their wallets, which wouldn't last us 2 weeks living in this house and paying rent plus food and essentials. We probably won't be able to stay here, it's too expensive.

The only man that I knew was looking for workers was Ward Cameron and he was like the riches man on the island. He was looking for people to work on his boat so I was planning to go over to his boat later on to see if I was qualified for the job.

During the night I also washed the blood that stain the wooden floors in the living room I scrubbed hard for hours trying to get it out from between the cracks. It was frustrating me so much to the point I was crying even more than before. It was the hardest thing I had to ever do. Wash the blood of my parents off my floor.

It broke me. This all broke me. As a person that didn't get scared by anything and didn't fear anything and was already broken. This scared me. This broke me even more. My heart shattered into a million pieces every moment I got reminded by the thought of them dying in front of me. I didn't know if I'll ever be able to piece it back together, but I had to stay strong for Dels and put up a tough front...
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I was still sitting on the counter. I have been sitting here for hours now. That emptiness I thought I got rid off when I got here was creeping back to me quicker than I thought. I was numb. I was in pain. I was lonely again.

I heard footsteps walking down the stairs
when I lifted my head up from looking at my sore wrists. I saw Dels. She had a sleepy look on her face. It was mixed with worry. I knew what that look meant,
it was a look that was asking me whether all of this was real or was she dreaming. Knowing her she wishes I say "it was a dream sweet pea" but that's lies.

My eyebrows dropped, a guilty expression filled my features. This answered her question. She ran up to me hugging me tightly. I knew she was in pain. I was too. I hugged her tightly as she let out a cry. Her tears staining the hoodie I wore to cover up the marks on my wrists with the long sleeves. I didn't want her to worry about that too. It looked way worst than yesterday.

She couldn't stop. Tears stained her face we stood there for about 30 minutes. Until she stopped I think she cried every tear she had within her. She was empty like me. I hated seeing her in so much pain.

I looked down at her, she looked up at me. I could see her face was a mess her eyes were bloodshot, her nose was red and her hair was a mess all over the place. I could see the dried tear stains on her cheek. She let out one last burning tear before I cupped her face and wiped it with my thumb. "Everything's going to be okay Dels, you still have me and I'm not leaving you ever you hear me, don't worry, I love you okay." Her eyes flushed with watery tears again. Before she spoke to me finally. "I know sis, but I- I just miss them-" she stuttered. "I know I miss them too." A sad expression appeared on my face. This was the first time since they died or maybe ever that Dels saw some kind of sad emotion on me. I saw that she was shocked. "I love you too Liv." She said holding my hand. I gave her a hug.

"I know Dels, just never leave me okay I don't want to lose you too."

A/N I didn't want to make this one too long so I'll carry the day in the next chapter where Liv will go and ask for a job. I'm sorry.  I cried whilst writing this. So if you cried I'm sorry. :(
Also this may all be a bit boring at the start because I want you all to know a bit about Liv and her background. So it will be a few chapters before I get to actual series, but in the next chapter she'll meet her first pogue :)

-J xx