Poems=Feelings

Written By Clairity Rose Calvillo

×××People like me

over time holding all these emotions in, I have become what I hate. The blamed wrapped around your lips, such a sin to blame those who did not ask to feel this way. They put on a mask of no emotion, forced half smiles. they are used to their feelings, swimming in the familiar pond we fear to escape. The void we try to fill, trying to fix what is who we are, we feel harder than others. I can not hide what is exploding inside of me! it burns everything around me, stabbing all of you. Why can this bliss not last?! I hate that I see myself within you. It is hard for me when I can not comprehend what is happening inside of me. I crave knowledge but nothing is good enough. No reason to feel the way you do, I do. But You have to learn and know that life does in fact get better, pain is temporary, but at the same time I realize there is always deep in your mind that doubt. knowing that you will eventually fall back down. Swirling and whirling into the abyss that absorbs you. But you can not let a chemical imbalance control you. Do not lose control, it is all you have. Sometimes there does not have to be a reason, It is there. Yet , you have to be strong for yourself, for those who are there. Free the emotion then accept the truth. Find a reason , there is always at least one, Pain is temporary. The scars are permanent, You have been through this before. It is beautiful that we can have these feelings. This addiction is worn. I know you want to see inside my mind. But, My feelings will swarm you and peel open that wound. Life IS in fact a roller coaster. Trust me, I know. for a person who holds it all in, they eventually crash upon the floor- falling apart- piece by piece- Like a vase that has slipped off the counter... spread out on the floor, waiting for the right person to pick the pieces up. Everyone is different. Yeah you have been in a similar situation, yeah you have the same "disorder", yeah you may "know how you feel". A splinter can be a gash but to another just a splinter.>>>

×××Love

I am in the abyss falling, colliding into the new without a clue of how I could live without you. Yet this love gains your bind is embedded in my mind. We keep falling, without a clue, Twisting words, that pierce through you this love gains it burns with these flames of the past. Burning flames that always last This tension in my chest.. My demons will not rest. Tears bleed, on my knees begging please!

Your eyes make it fade like the night turning to day. This love gains your bind is embedded in my mind. Descending into the abyss, become blind to all that is take my hand. Guide me off of this ledge, I know sometimes I am on on the edge. Sometimes we clash but this perception does not fade. The souls invade their way into each other with this facade. In this life considering hte odds and ends our love always wins. Your bind is embedded around my mind. We keep falling, without a clue, Twisting words, that pierce through you, your writhing in pain, yet the love gains. Touching bodies, heated up memories, they burn with the flames of the past. Burning flames that will always last.Love me now, love me forever, now and together, until the painful end.

Fuck the sun, my heart is on my sleeve, this is so new to me. It feels so warm even though it looks so indignant, the brain feels as if it is not mine. These eyes only see death, so I am the reaper, Eternity is mine but I want to share it with you. This is so new, yet Nothing satisfies my succubus. Self hate Pain infiltrates violence is today's quicksand

×××Behind the smile2020

Release me from this hell*Beyond this prison cell I long to see the light of day, *Chain me, Contain these* these feelings within me, Trapped inside a sickened mind Hidden behind a smile, *Drowning in slime, Bored with demise,* Let my soul escape this misery You pin the chain, but I can't contain, What poisons my brain. I crash to the floor, my heart is made of tar, An open wound to hide the scar,I open the door but you stay,Beyond the mask I cannot see,Wasting time with what's behind me, Feeding the anger that burns inside, It consumes you and I,Let my soul be free,Let it escape beyond fantasy,Even if my body decays my lifeless corpse trapped Let my soul escape this misery You pin the chain, but I can not hide What poisons my brain it explodes out of me , and I Keep crashing to the floor, my heart is made of tar, An open wound to hide the scar, I open the door but you stay, This sorrow is a sore my mind is stained with your blood, an open wound swarmed to infection, starved of truth, beaten with deception *Break* Let my soul be free, Let it escape beyond fantasy, Even if my body decays, betrays, I'm lifeless corpse trapped, beyond remorse, I open the door but you stay. Let my soul escape, You pin the chain, but I can pretend, you poison my brain, bored with these eyes, your eyes, bored with the lies (extend: li-es) *Immediate stop* I can't contain
"Original"