Eyes Wide Open [TWD]

°•eight•°

I look back to his eyes as he awaits my own condition.

"You can't do this again," I motion to him.

"What?" He questions.

"Get hurt," I explain, "Get hurt, get stabbed, get shot, get punched.. get bit."

I shake my head, the thought of any of that happening making me nauseous.

"You can't do any of that. You can't put me through that. Not again."

"Deal," Carl nods.

"Deal," I nod back.

--

I was walking back to camp to get Carl his favorite comic when I heard the screaming-

"Pull!" "Pull!" "Let's go!"

I quickly divert my attention to the source. T-Dog, Lori, Maggie, dad, Andrea,and Dale were all in a pile, screaming and holding onto something.

I didn't run over until a new voice distantly echoed.

"Get me out! Get me out!"

"Glenn?" I question myself as I believe my ears deceive me.

I don't give it a second thought and run as quickly as I could to them.

"Pull him up! Pull him up! Pull him up!" The screaming intensifies.

I push myself faster and once I reach them, Glenn stumbles out of a hole in the ground. He's sweating and panting and instead of asking what happened, I fall to his side.

"Jade!" Dad calls as I collapse beside Glenn.

Glenn's eyes notice me and his arms fold around my waist, pulling me to him and hiding his face in my side, afraid of the scenario that just took place.

"Are you okay?" I ask wrapping my own arms around his shoulders as if I could protect him.

He nods in my side and Dale bends beside me, setting a hand on Glenn's rapidly raising then falling back.

"Back to the drawing board," Andrea mutters.

Finally, Glenn sits up. Dale and I also stand, Dale giving him a helping hand up.

"Says you," Glenn pants and hands Dale the rope he was holding.

I'm forced to walk along with Glenn as he pushes me to follow his steps.

--

Glenn forced me to go away from the well, didn't give me an answer why though. So instead, I go to the RV, my original plan. As I'm grabbing Carl's comic, I notice a guitar. Gaining an idea, I grab the neck of it and hop down the steps.

"Dale? You play this?" I ask holding it up the best I can.

Dale looks down from his usual spot and shakes his head.

"No, you?" He asks.

"No but, I know someone who does."

"Go ahead and take it. Find some use for it."

--

Later that night, I sat in my tent, my teeth nearly chattering from the cold. I brought my knees to my chest, at least an effort to warm up. Finally, as I slowly lost the feeling in my toes, I stood up. I pulled my blanket around me, slipped my shoes on, and headed outside. I wasn't sure where dad was. He was supposed to be on watch, but I gave up trying to guess.

I made my way over to where the fire was still lit. It was smaller than usual but better than staying in the tent. I sat in silence for awhile, thinking over everything that's happened the past few months. It was crazy how much life can change in a year.

I wasn't sure how long I was still sitting beside the fire before finally beginning to warm up. Just as I was able to move my toes again, someone joined me.

"Jade?" Lori asks.

My body stiffens immediately and I slowly look up to her.

"What are you doing out here, sweetheart?" She jumps, rushing towards me and pulling my blanket more secure around me.

Confused by her gesture, I shake my head, muttering softly, "Too cold to sleep."

"Stay here," she says and jogs to her empty tent.

She and Rick were staying inside while Carl was recovering and haven't used their tent since. But, it still held most of their belongings.

Once she returns, she's holding a larger blanket. I couldn't help but think back to the CDC and the nursing home as she wraps it around my shoulders.

"Why aren't you in the RV? It'd be much warmer than the tent," she says as she sits beside me.

The uncomfortable feeling rose in me as she wraps her arm around me, an attempt to keep me warm.

"Dad.... Dad told me we should stay in the tent to not crowd everyone else," I explain.

"Does he know you're out here?" She asks and I notice the waver in her voice.

"No, he's on watch," I tell her.

She nods and I can feel as her body relaxes.

We're silent for a few minutes before the guilt is ripping me to shreds.

"I'm sorry," I nearly whisper.

I was surprised she could hear me. She exhales through her nose and rubs my arm under the blanket.

"I know, honey. Don't worry, I can't imagine how you've been feeling," she sighs.

"How much are you gonna let me know?" I ask, picking at my fingernails.

"Depends, how much do you know?" She asks back.

"I know it's been happening since the quarry. Maybe longer. I know something happened at the CDC," I list my short but still more than enough knowledge.

Lori is quiet for a moment and I look up to her. Her other hand that's not wrapped around me is clutched to her mouth and her eyes are wide with tears.

"Lori?" I ask softly, afraid she might break if I speak to loudly.

"You- you know what happened at the CDC?" She asks, a hiccup in her voice.

"I heard him say he loved you. But, I got scared. I ran after that," I admit.

"Jade, whatever you think happened at the CDC, it's not what it really is," her shaky voice says.

"Then, what was it?" I ask, ignorantly.

Lori sighs and stands from her seat. She kneels in front of me and takes both of my hands in hers.

"I should say you're too young to know what it was but I also know you're too young to see a dead body," she sniffles.

"That's been blown out of the water," I say. Lori forces a smile and nods.

"Just, don't hate your father for this," she begins.

As she tells the full story, I tried to do what she said. With every word that fell from her lips, starting back from the quarry, to the CDC, to here.. I tried.

As she explained the things they did, I tried not to be disgusted.

As she explained the feelings involved, I tried to not feel betrayed for myself, Carl, and Rick.

As she explained the vile things he said and attempted, I tried not to hate him.

All three came up short.

I was disgusted, betrayed, and I hated my own father.

--

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