Destructive (On Hold)

Stability

Jayden and Panda were standing on a rickety deck through some clear sliding doors outside the living room. They were facing out towards the view of a grey sky and more city streets. I couldn't tell what they looked like, or who was who. I just knew they were Calypso's old friends.

"Don't worry," Calypso said, "they're nice enough." She wouldn't stop biting her lip though.

She fumbled with the latch of the sliding door and then slid it open. The two people outside turned simultaneously and took a moment to register who they were seeing.

"Hey, Cal," the boy said breezily. He had blonde hair with brown streaks and greasy skin, tall and lanky.  His hair was long and his eyes were bronze. He was kind of attractive but at the same time looked dirty - however so did I, after a week with no showering.

The girl was pretty and had brunette hair below her shoulders, dramatically arched eyebrows and was wearing grey trackpants and a hoodie. She, like Anna, was smoking a cigarette but stubbed it out on the wooden and peeling railing before coming over to embrace Calypso. The boy hung back but nodded at me. 

"Hi. Jayden," he introduced himself, holding out his hand to me. I shook it but was overly conscious of how long and dirty my fingernails had become. I badly wanted a shower, to wash my hair and rid my body of the odour it had acquired over the past few days.

"I'm Ruby," I replied, smiling unconvincingly.

Calypso and who I now assumed to be Panda drew apart and I recieved another introduction.

Panda and Jayden had been living here for three years, Calypso left a year ago. The rent's so cheap, anyone could stay here who knew about it. "Mostly runaways, running from their family or even the law," Panda explained eloquently. Calypso nodded, but her eyes were focussed on splitting her split ends.

"So... are you running from the law, or what?" I asked nervously.

Jayden laughed, a tinkling laugh but didn't reply. He seemed to let Panda do all the talking, and she didn't seem to mind.

"No. I just couldn't get a proper job by the time I was eighteen, and my mum kicked me out. I had to find somewhere to stay, and..." she sighed, "Greg's an okay guy."

"What about you?" I asked Jayden daringly. I felt rude about prying but I did want to know.

He shrugged. "My dad was..." he made a dismissive hand gesture like I understood what he meant. "Like, you know?" No, I thought. 

Panda smiled at him. "Jayden's got a way with words," she joked. I found myself laughing. It was a long time since I'd laughed properly and it felt good. I didn't even know these people but I still felt like I fit in with them, more than I did at the orphanage where all the kids had to be mean and uncaring to get what they wanted, and even in school where the other kids were smarter than me and had nicer clothes, and parents. That stung a lot, watching kids getting picked up by their mum or dad in a Ford after school, overhearing others saying how embarrassing it was to be seen with their mother shopping at Kmart. It made me want to cry. I'd have loved to go shopping with my mum.

"So what's your story?" Panda asked, serious now. "You look a little young to be on the road," she said forebodingly, scanning me up and down. 

That sentence made me panic inside. I didn't want to be turned in. Anything but to go back.

"I, well, I..." I looked to Calypso for help. She nodded at me. Was it really okay to tell these two strangers my past?

"I ran away from the orphanage. Well, I'm an orphan. The others get fostered sometimes. So it's a foster home. I didn't get fostered because I was the runt of the litter. This is my only way out - other than waiting till I'm eighteen, and even then I'd have to be stuck in a dead end job for two years to move out and buy my own place. Plus, they all treat me like... Well. You know," I said, using Jayden's avoidance tactic.