CHOICE

1 : Dark

I don't have anything that interests me.
My world is just a dark pool, quite and tedious.
I live my life, every day with nothing I want to accomplish, just mare do routine, wake up, eat, go to school, sleep and breathing.
Bored? No. If you never feel anything fun, you won't feel bored. Just numb?? I guess that what I feel.. Numb... I never feel scared, nor happy, nor excited. I can feel a little physical pain, but just a little, so that what I feel... Numb... It's Me!

.
When I was three years olds my nanny, drug me every day with sleeping pills, so she don't have to deal with me. And when I'm not sleeping she vocally abused me, and say ill word about my self and my mom.

.
After six months, my busy mom start to notice my silences, so she make her move and hire people to oversee my daily routine, and not long she busted my nanny behaviour of course.

.
My Mom sue her, and put her on jail in a very long time, she is influence magnifying anyway, and I was her only son! Of course she use all her power to make the nanny down to hell.

.
But she a bit too late I guess? Because the three years old me not giving a good response to anything, I not laughing, nor crying, just stay still with empty eyes. When I grow up, the doctor's who examined me said that I had a psychologist conditions, it's call Schizoid syndrome, to make it's short it's mean I lack of human emotions.

.
.
.
Today like every days before, I walk myself to school, I always took my walk to school, it's just to make me kill some time, rather than quickly came to home and do nothings.

.
Looking the peaceful sky is one of what I can said I like, or looking at the river, some people will find it so boring, but for me it's ease my mind.

.
But today something happen, something pump my adrenaline even it's not make my face muscles move so much, but my heart beat is rising.

.
I saw a tiny dog float, and try to swim to the river side... I run as fast as I can, try to reach it, but I'm too far away!!! I trails the side of the bridge, my eyes fix on the puppies. I not gonna make it!!! Shit!!! It's gonna drowning!!!

.
In a flash I see someone run so fast while opening their sweaters, and one of them more faster, without hesitation they jump to the dirty water, and swimming to save the dog!!!

.
I cheers them inside my head, and not slower my pace!!! And YES!!!! One of them get the dog!!! They make it!!!! YES!! I watch them from the corner of my eyes, and keep on running!

.
When I reach at the river side, I can see the dog is save, it's waving his tail and licking his saviour face, witch make her laughing, she wrapped the dog with her dry sweater, and don't give a damn care about her own dripping wet hair.

.
(Stud...) There something like electric wave sting my internal organs... Tickle my stomach and make me tile my own head a little wonder what sensation that I just feel, and what is it? It's new for me.

.
I see a boy that run with her before came from behind her, throw another sweater to her head, and start to ruffing her head roughly! And somehow another sting electric wave crawl through my chest, but it's different from before!! It's make me piss off!

.
That boy took his bicycle and the girl hop behind him, and still busy warming that little dog wet body, stoking his fur and hugging it tight, try to transfer warm to it.

.
Not to long, they pass where I stand and I watching them, the boys notice me, and he was frown, give me a glare, he look piss off too.
While he pass me I keep glazing the girl behind him, take her picture in my mind, yet she doesn't notice me at all, she was too busy taking care of the dog! Her smiling face is adhere in my mind... And another wave give a spark at my abdomen.