Seasons Change

26.

For his part, Luke was incredibly patient with me, even though he clearly had much more skating experience than I did. He stayed with me, giving me pointers on how to keep my balance.

"Bend your knees," he advised. "If you lock your legs straight, it's impossible to balance."

I laughed wryly. "You make it sound easy," I said, trying to do as he suggested and bend my knees more. He was right, it did help a little.

Luke skated backwards in front of me, glancing over his shoulder occasionally to make sure he didn't run into the wall or any other skaters.

"You're a show off," I told him, watching the way he made it look so easy.

Luke shook his head at me. "It's not that difficult, Lillian," he said. "We are literally just skating in circles."

I shrugged. "It's harder than it looks," I said. "I'm just happy I haven't fallen yet. Although, I'm sure that will come when I have to figure out how to stop."

Luke laughed, cocking his head at me. "You seriously don't know how to stop?"

"How would I know?" I said defensively. "I barely know how to stay standing."

"Well, yeah, but shouldn't that have been the first question you asked then? You wouldn't drive a car without knowing how to use the brake, right?"

"I mean, if I was going slow enough I might," I joked.

Luke shook his head. "Wow. I am so glad I always drove on our dates. I never want to get in a car with you driving, ever. In fact, I don't think I want to be driving when you're on the road."

"Watch it, Lucas, or I will push you off your skates," I threatened.

He laughed. "I'd love to see you try. You'd probably just fall on your face."

I probably would, but I was still slightly tempted to try. Instead, I reached out and grabbed Luke's hand. He spun around so he was skating next to me, and we skated, hand in hand. I was proud that I only wobbled slightly as we skated.

After our skating date, Luke offered to stop at the coffee shop, but legs were super sore from skating, so I asked him to go through the drive through instead, so I wouldn't have to get out and walk into the coffee shop. Yes, I know, I'm lazy. Don't judge.

We returned to Luke's house with our drinks—him with a large coffee, and me with a large hot chocolate. His parents weren't home, so we had the house entirely to ourselves. Luke led me inside, and we settled next to each other on the couch, sipping our drinks.

"So, this was fun," I said, trying to keep the conversation going. Somehow, I could never quite find the right words to say around Luke. Something about him always made me feel awkward, like I was an immature kid and he was going to judge me for it.

"Yeah, it was a lot of fun," Luke agreed, reaching out and grabbing my hand.

I looked down at his hand in mine, and wondered why it felt so strange to me. It was perfectly pleasant, the way his hand fit in mine, our fingers laced together. It wasn't gross, or sweaty. But it just didn't feel quite right, and I wasn't sure why that was.

As much as I liked Luke, and thought he was a good guy, I wasn't sure I liked him romantically. That ship had sailed for me. I didn't get butterflies in my stomach when he looked at me, and although I enjoyed our time together, I didn't crave it. I just felt...friendship.

"I think we should talk about our relationship," Luke said, and I gaped at him, wondering if he had somehow read my mind.

"What about it?" I squeaked.

Luke shifted next to me on the couch, turning so that he was facing me as he talked. His dark brown eyes bore into mine, as though he were trying to gauge what I was thinking. I gulped nervously, not sure I liked the idea of having a heart to heart with Luke. I wasn't ready. I still wasn't sure what I felt.

"Lillian, we've been spending a lot of time together, and I think we need to define our relationship, to make sure there are no confused feelings," he said.

"Okay?"

He sighed, pressing his lips together in a thin line, as though he was afraid that the words he was about to say would hurt my feelings.

"I know we've been reconnecting, and I've really enjoyed that, but I have to be honest: I just don't think of you romantically. I have feelings for someone else."

I exhaled hard, feeling more than a little relieved at that. "Oh, good," I breathed.

Luke frowned. "Well, you don't have to sound so relieved about it," he grumbled. "I'm not that repulsive."

I giggled. "No, you're not," I agreed. "You're great. And I'm glad we're friends. I just don't feel like we have any chemistry anymore."

I nudged him. "So, are you going to tell me about this girl you have feelings for? Do I know her?"

Luke frowned. "Oh, no you don't. I'm not letting you off the hook that easily. What about you? Who do you like?"

I froze. "No one," I said defensively.

He crossed his arms, smirking at me. "Lillian Marie Faye, I know you better than that. It's completely obvious."

"What is?"

"That you like my cousin."

I shook my head. "Why does everyone keep saying that? Dylan and I are just friends."

"Really?" he asked sarcastically. "Do you hang out all the time? Spend a lot of time one on one?"

I nodded. "Yeah, but friends do that."

"When you go out together, who pays?"

I frowned. I had never really thought about it, but yeah, Dylan usually offered to pay whenever we went out together. But that didn't necessarily mean anything. His family was loaded because his father had been in the NFL. Money wasn't a big deal to him.

Luke nodded. "That's what I thought," he said, even though I hadn't answered.

"Friends can do those things," I said defensively.

"Maybe," he said. "But I think you like him as more than a friend. In fact, judging by the way you're turning bright red, I'm fairly confident."

And, although I wanted to deny it, I couldn't quite bring myself to make the words come out of my mouth. Instead, a bunch of things clicked into place for me: the way it had bothered me so much when Dylan flirted with other girls. The reason it had made me insanely jealous whenever I saw him with Avery.

And then there was the fact that Dylan was so easy to be around. We never had trouble making conversation. He almost always could cheer me up when I was upset. He never made me feel like I wasn't good enough. Unlike with Luke, where everything felt awkward, with Dylan, everything came easily. It felt right.

And that's when I realized: I liked Dylan. I had a crush on my best friend. And that was a pretty big problem, because I had absolutely no idea what to do about it.
–
Ahhh, this chapter has a lot for you to take in.
For all you Lilly shippers, I hope you aren't too upset!

What do you guys think of Lilly's realization, are you excited?

What do you think will happen in the these last few chapters now?

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