Unknown Connection

Part 1

Hi, I'm Cagan Baltas, a BA Communication froshie at Southside Colleges. This story isn't long but I hope it would continue. I can't tell if this is a love story since I'm not sure of what I really feel about him. Yep, 'him' and I'm a guy, too.

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Here's my story.

It all began when we were Grade 12. In our classroom, when my classmate, Dominic Cortez, hugged me tightly. I felt something different. "This isn't right," I thought and struggled to remove his arms on me.

I am a Christian and I support this idea of "a man is for a woman, and a woman is for a man." I disagree with the movements of LGBTQ+ groups. This is why I feel uncomfortable when guys, even my friends, try to hug me.

Anyways, I've been to unlabeled relationships or should I say, 'Mutual Understanding' with some girls at school. But we didn't work out. I was too busy at school works and attending to church ministry things. They say that I brought them pressure due to my position as the President of the Student Council.

At some points, I understood them. But I never meant to let them feel that way. I was sincere actually all along — writing letters, giving chocolates and flowers, and asking how did their days go, a typical sweet guy would do for his girl. Or maybe, I was too cheesy. Hmmm.

Ordinary days, Dominic would still hug me from behind. I still remove his arms and tell him to stop, but he does it all the time. Until such time when our adviser saw him hugging me sooo tightly. "Dominic? Why are you doing that to Cagan?" our adviser asked. Dominic removed his arms on me and went back to his chair as if nothing happened. His face that time was plain, seemed sad.

One time, he sat beside me, asking him to help with the assignment. As his classmate and friend, I helped him. I was shocked when he suddenly put his left hand on my right lap and caressed it. I took off his hand on my lap and asked him, "Hey. What's that?" He responded smiling, "Nothing. I just wanted to thank you." "You could have just said it without touching me," I told him. But that time, I felt my body increased its temperature and felt my ears turned red. I quickly went to the restroom to shake it off, telling myself that "It's okay. Nothing's wrong."

Dominic is actually a good guy. He is caring and thoughful of his friends. He is handsome — and I envy that. Girls run after him (even gays). He is sporty, too, as he is a varsity player in the volleyball team. He has fair complexion, chinky eyes, broad shoulders, and tall.

While I do have fair complexion as well but I have pimples on my face, which I don't like about me the most. I have a small physique and short height, which is the second thing I don't like about myself.