𝐂𝐔𝐑𝐋𝐘 𝐇𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐃 𝐊𝐈𝐃𝐒. matthew gray gubler

↳ xiv. i'm scared of falling for you

Matthew sensed the movement, adjusting his grip around my waist tighter. The next move was shocking to me; he lifted his free arm, peeling his hand from mine before repositioning his arm around me, letting his hand rest on the small of my back. This only brought him closer, and I let it all happen, not moving so he'd continue thinking I was asleep.

I was completely cocooned by his body now, my face buried into the crook of his neck. My heart continued to mercilessly pound against my sternum, making me feel a little dizzy. I don't know why, but I felt like hysterically laughing and crying at the same time.

This felt so good, it should be illegal.

A few more minutes passed, and I was finally beginning to feel a little calm again. That was until Matthew moved once again, his hand moving to the back of my head, tangling itself in my curls and rubbing my scalp like before.

Then, he leaned in, and I felt a pressure on the top of my head, my breath catching in my throat hearing the soft kiss-sound his lips made. My stomach exploded with butterflies, realizing he had just kissed the top of my head, probably still thinking I was asleep.

I gulped hard, my face heating up at the mere thought of the gesture. I could barely even breathe due to the feelings rushing through me—it felt so good, him doing that.

All I wanted to do was open my eyes, lift my head and face him, before putting my lips on his. But I couldn't. I couldn't, and I wouldn't. As much as I itched to touch and claim every inch of this man, I knew I shouldn't.

Instead, I let myself bask in the euphoric feeling, telling myself that this was enough. As long as we were friends, it would all be okay.

It was silent for a while, Matthew's soft breaths serenading me to a deep state of relaxation. I was suddenly ready to fall asleep again, hoping I'd wake up and still be in his arms.

Suddenly, I heard a creak, indicating that the trailer door opened, feeling my heart fall to the pit of my stomach. I bit my lip, feeling Matthew's arms around me tighten, almost possessively, telling whoever just entered that this was his moment only. The thought made me smile, and I pretended I was still asleep just to see what he'd do.

"Shemar, be any louder, will you?" Matthew snapped in annoyance, and I almost snorted.

"Holy—" I heard Shemar whispered, and then silence. I wanted to lift my head to see if they were communicating to the other in some bro-code.

"Get out." Matthew said.

"Dude, your—you—"

"Shemar, get out." He said again, this time in a whiny voice. "You're gonna wake her up." Matthew said in annoyance, and I felt my heart go warm.

"Okay, okay." Shemar whispered. "I'll let you have your moment of glory, but you got some explaining to do." He said warningly.

"Yeah yeah." Matthew muttered, holding me tighter. I could tell me was doing it to show off, which make me all giddy inside.

"How come you never cuddle me like that, Matthew?" Shemar asked, and I bit my tongue to stop myself from cackling.

"Because you're not her, dumbass."

Aww fuck. This is too cute.