Enough Is Enough
"I have an aunt who, whenever she poured anything for you, would say, 'say when.' My aunt would say, 'say when,' and of course we never did. We don't say 'when' because there's something about the possibility of more. More tequila. More love. More anything. More is better."
I laid on the bathroom floor next to Meredith while Christina sat in the bathtub.
"It's not us, it's them and their stupid boy penises. All he had to say was the L word to me and I would have worked this all out with him. They give absolutely no warning that they were going to break up with you." I said looking up at the ceiling. Christina slid the shower door open.
"It's not that Burke broke up with me. It's how he broke up with me. Like it was business. Like a business...like he's the boss of me." Christina yelled and I pointed at her.
"He is the boss of you." Meredith said and I nodded pointing towards her.
"And what's worse is that I care." Christina said. My stomach switched and I crawled over to the toilet.
"I'm going to throw up again." I said before Christina shut the shower door and Meredith turned around not watching as I leaned over the toilet, I paused. "No. wait. False alarm." I said before moving back away from the toilet.
"The problem is estrogen." Christina said and Meredith shook her head in disagreement.
"No, the problem is tequila." Meredith expressed and I nodded in agreement.
"I used to be all business, then he gets me pregnant." Christina said.
"With the stupid boy penis." I hummed in response.
"Now I'm having hormone surges. He ruined me. I'm ruined. He turned me into this fat, stupid, pregnant girl, who cares. Estrogen!" Christina said before closing the shower door again.
"Penises." Meredith and I exclaimed back.
"Penises, Izzy!" I exclaimed to Izzy.
"Estrogen, George." Christina said to George as they both walked into the bathroom.
"Ok. What did I miss?" George asked as a Izzy poured Christina some water.
"Came home to full vomit drama. She dumped Derek. And her. She's been sleeping with Burke." Izzy explained and George nodded.
"I knew that." George replied. "So, you really broke up with Shepherd?" George asked before starting to brush his teeth.
"I feel empty." I said staring into nothingness.
"2 hours of vomiting will do that to you." Izzy expressed and I signed.
"No, I feel empty." I explained.
"You're lucky. I feel pissed off." Christina expressed closing the shower door again. I got up and had a shower in Merediths bathroom and got ready for work before leaving. I arrived at work and noticed Derek leaning against the pole by the car. I scoffed.
"Stop." I said.
"What?" Derek asked before following me.
"You're stalking me. Stop it." I explained.
"Did we not communicate last night?" Derek asked and I nodded.
"Yes." I said.
"Did you hear what I was saying?" Derek asked again and I nodded.
"Your wife screwed your best friend. I know, I was there." I mentioned and Derek nodded.
"Then from that point on she no longer existed to me anymore." Derek said.
"You had marital amnesia." I said.
"I basically poured my soul to you last night." Derek said and I shook my head.
"It's not enough." I said.
"Why?" Derek asked.
"You don't L-word me. I was just there and I helped you breath but you don't L-word me. So now I'm like an open drain, anything you say just runs straight out." I yelled before turning around and walking inside. It was a slow day today, I used it as my way of getting paper work done. I sat at the nurses station with Christina, Meredith and Alex.
"My mother used to buy me Judy dolls. Manhattan Judy, Surfer Judy, Disco Judy." Christina said and I chuckled.
"I always found them creepy." I said.
"I always wanted one." Meredith added.
"I dissected them. Cut off their arms and shaved their heads." Christina informed us and I shook my head in disgust.
"Sounds like a sick and twisted story behind this." Alex stated and I laughed softly.
"They're sexist, distorted devil toys that create unrealistic image expectations catering to the porn-driven minds of men." Christina expressed and I chuckled before noticing Bailey. I looked down and continued to fill in my paper work.
"You swallow a bitter pill this morning, Yang? They're dolls. Grey, call for a psych consult, then see if he has family." Bailey said and Meredith nodded.
"Do I still book the OR?" Meredith asked.
"Blocked vowels become necrotic bowels. Check with Dr. Burke. See if we can bump someone. Those Judy's got to come out today." Bailey said before walking away. I signed.
"I should have become a General Surgeon. I'd get cases like that, instead of filling out paper work while Burke is doing all the good Cardio cases." I expressed and Christina laughed at me.
"Oh come on, you'll get cases. It's just not many people have heart problems that often." Christina said and I nodded.
"I know. In New York I was head of Cardio and I was getting patient's left, right and center." I said before Christina stood up and left. I was walking down the hall when I bumped into Addison.
"Dr. Grey? May I speak with you for a moment?" Addison asked and I nodded walking over to her by the nurses station.
"I assume he told you why he left me?" Addison asked and I raised my eye brows up in confusion.
"I have known why he left you since it happened. That night after he caught you and Mark he came over to my house and explained it to me and slept on my couch. So right now, this has nothing to do with me." I explained and Addison stared at me before I continued to walk.
"Really? So you didn't take him back? Good girl." Addison said and I scoffed.
"Derek's my best friend, no matter what. I'm always on his side, you aren't good for him and to be honest I don't think I am either." I said before continuing to walk.
"Evangeline." Addison said and I turned to look at her. "Sometimes people do desperate things to get someone's attention. There are two sides to every story." Addison said and I scoffed.
"That isn't how you get someone's attention, no matter how distant Derek was becoming from you." I exclaimed before walking away not wanting to look at her anymore.
"There's something to be said about a class half full. About knowing when to say 'when.' I think it's a floating line. A barometer of need and desire. It's entirely up to the individual...and depends on what's being poured. Sometimes, all we want is a taste. Other times, there's no such thing as enough. The glass is bottomless. And all we want...is more."
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Save Lives // Derek Shepherd
FanfictionIn your life have you ever fallen for someone you know could never be yours? Evangeline Grey, the eldest daughter of a world renowned surgeon, Ellis Grey. While Ellis gave her up as a child she never lost contact. As Evangeline grew up she new she w...
