Rules Of Attraction

Chapter 30

Surprisingly, our designs got approved. Mayroon nga lang mga kailangan iadjust. By next week, we'll start working with Architect Cruz's team. Ang isang linggong pahinga ko ay iginugol ko sa pagmumukmok.

"Addison, umayos ka na nga. Para ka namang tanga diyan. Kung iiyak ka lang pala dito sa Pilipinas, sana 'di na lang tayo bumalik." Cachi said. She's trying to get me out of my bed. Literal kasi talaga na hindi ako lumalabas ng kwarto. I'm mad at my brother and I don't want to see him.

"I just want to rest." I groaned and pulled the comforter up to my head.

"Rest?" Cachi sarcastically said. "So you rest by crying? Wow. Nice."

"Where's Ky?" I asked instead.

"Downstairs with Zeus and his girlfriend."

"Fiancé," I corrected her.

"Whatever," she replied.

Ilang sandali pa niya ako pinilit bumangon pero desidido talaga ako na sa kwarto lang. Wala naman akong importanteng gagawin kaya mas mabuti pa na ikulong ko na lang ang sarili ko dito. I was thinking of getting my own place while lying on the bed. Ang problema ko lang ay kung paano ko iyon sasabihin kay Daddy. I just got back and I don't know how to tell him that I'll be leaving the house. Baka magtampo iyon.

Nang dumating ay hapon ay bumangon ako para maligo. I also arranged my clothes in my closet. Napagdesisyunan ko na magtagal muna rito sa bahay ng mga tatlong buwan bago magsabi kay Daddy na lilipat ako. Maybe I'll get a condo. Hanggang dito kasi sa bahay namin, my memories with Zion are hunting me.

"Umalis na ba sila Cachi?" I asked my brother when he checked on me.

"Yeah. Bad trip sayo," he answered.

"Bad trip din ako sayo," I said and covered my self with comforter again.

Narinig ko ang pagsara ng pinto ko. Maya maya ay lumundo ang gilid ng kama ko kaya napagtanto kong pumasok si Kuya sa kwarto ko. I pretended that he's not around at ipinikit na lang ang mga mata ko pero inalis niya ang comforter na nakabalot sakin.

"Addison," he called me.

"Ano ba 'yun?" iritadong tanong ko.

"I get why you're mad at me but you know you can't be mad forever, right? I'm sorry I did that to you but don't you think it's already time for you to move on? Apat na taon na kayong tapos. Apat na taon mo na rin pinaparusahan ang sarili mo. Hindi ka ba napapagod?" he said. "You broke up with him but what happened isn't entirely your fault. Hayaan mo naman makausad 'yung sarili mo."

My heart hurt at each word he said because he's right. Pinaparusahan ko ang sarili ko dahil sinaktan ko si Zion. I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive myself for that. Iyon ang dahilan kung bakit ni minsan ay hindi ko sinubukan maging masaya sa iba. Aside from the fact that I love Zion so much, I'll just feel guilty if I let other man to my life. Zion is the only deserving man for me but I don't deserve him. Not anymore. Still, I don't regret what I did. Lagi kong pinapaalala sa sarili ko na ginawa ko iyon para sakanya.

"I'll be okay, Kuya." Ngumiti na lang ako kay Kuya.

He sighed and carresed my hair. He kept on saying sorry and I just nodded. Maya maya ay tumayo na siya para lumabas.

"They're not together, you know," he said and stopped first before going out of my room.

My forehead creased in confusion. Mayroong pumasok sa isip ko pero puno pa rin ako ng pagtataka.

"Who?" I asked to make sure.

"Van and Amanda."

My mouth parted in shock. Not together? Then why would they act like a couple? I even heard him call Amanda 'baby'. I used to love that endearment but I think I hate it now.