New Beginnings || New Limits [Prequel]

14| Taking a Chance

***

I was in my office writing an email for one of the partners for the Applied Sciences building, my conversation with Oliver Queen running through my mind even now. Last night I found sleep difficult my mind plagued with the same problem that it does now. In my heart I felt how I missed the adrenaline that a good fight brought, last night being a painful reminder of it. But that reminder also brought the fear that it was possibly the blood lust that being a part of the League of Assassins usually brought.

A small knock sounded from the door seeming to violently snap me out of my thoughts before returning them to the same dark hole as before as Oliver Queen stepped into the room. I knew what he wanted and why he was here. He had to know that what he was doing her couldn't do it on his own, even if his ego refused to let him believe as much. "What can I help you with Mr. Queen?"

"Just Oliver." He said simply as he took a seat across from me, the desk separating the two of us. It was odd to see him now when only a couple hours ago we were fighting in an alleyway, and now we were taking like nothing every happened. "I was thinking about last night and how quickly you were able to gain the upper hand. It's clear that I need a little more training."

I studied him for a moment and found myself pleased that it seemed to pain him to speak the words. "Yes, well I would be a disappointment if I hadn't, considering that I practically learned how to hold a sword as I was learning how to take my first steps."

"Wait. You were born into the League?"

"We weren't all born into a wealthy family." I replied rather bitterly, there had never been an instant where I imagined not being born into the League.

It seemed that Oliver was no longer attempted to hide his own curiosity as he leaned forward. "I'm assuming you know Ra's al Ghul."

I felt myself swallow harshly at the mention of his name.It was a name I had not heard spoken for a long time, but plagued my thoughts constantly. "Ra's al Ghul raised me like if I was one of his daughters."

"Is that why he hasn't sent you to be killed yet?" He asked, attempting to answer the question that I have been asking myself for years now. I part of me knew that he had to know, although I knew I had been able to cover my tracks expertly Ra's was too powerful man to fool. Especially when everything that I know I learned from him. And I could only wonder what his reasoning behind his actioned in regards to me where.

"Ra's is a very difficult man to understand. I couldn't begin to assume why he hasn't sent for me to be killed yet."

"Why did you leave?" Oliver asked and I knew he had thought of his questions thoroughly.

"Because of something that you will soon learn to understand if you continue on your current path." I replied, feeling an incredible amount of weight being lifted from my chest just speaking my truths. Of course I had told Roy about somethings, but never the whole truth. The fear of him being horrified of the person that I was before was too great. But Oliver understood, whatever he experienced these last five years left him almost as scared as I am. That was clear in his eyes. And maybe that was why I found myself telling him all of this about myself. The need for someone who understood being too great. "That at some point you take one life too many and you begin to fear yourself, and you no longer recognize your own reflection. So tell me Oliver why are you doing this?"

He then went on to vaguely describe to me some of his time on the island. The most important detail being the fact that Robert Queen had killed himself in order to increase Oliver's chances of survival. But not before leaving Oliver a list of names of the people in this city that had a hand in the corruption of this city. I understood then, that just as I yearned for someone to confide in that Oliver did too. "I understand. But this is a mission that is too big."