Ghetto Fabulous

Rain On Me

All I ever wanted in life was for everybody to see me exactly as I seen myself. The girl who was born into the struggle but used her situation to better herself and her family. The girl who values the little things in life instead of materialistic things that we can't take with us when we die. The girl who has the biggest heart and willing to do anything to help another person. But sadly, the world isn't that fair.

My biggest saying is "Everything happens for a reason" however I'm still confused on why I had to live through so much trauma and pain. My life wasn't the easiest yet I always tried to see the silver lining in everything. Life isn't done with me yet and I don't know what the future holds for me but I know my pain won't be in vain.

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My name is Monaé, I'm 23, and if you reading this I'm pretty sure I'm from where you from "the struggle". I'm not going to tell you whether some events are real or fictional I'll let you come up with that on your own. It's so much I would like to say so you can get to know me but I don't know where to start. Should I go down memory lane and start from an infant? Or should I just start with the current events? I'm asking because I want to know what you'll like to know first because my story can be brutal, inspiring, cut throat, and emotional.

Let's just start from the beginning.....

I was born in Summer 1998, I believe a result of birthday sex. My parents just to start had never been in a relationship with each other (key point take note). Growing up I never seen my parents show love or be affectionate towards one another. It was always bickering back and forth my mother would bash my father all the time, and my father would talk shit back in response. My father was on the run my mother whole pregnancy and the day I was born he was loud and rowdy that morning because he was drinking. He actually had to get kicked out the hospital for causing a scene.

Two week later he was arrested and sent to jail. To tell you the truth I don't know how long his sentence was but I knew it was for a long time because I don't have no memory of being with my father until I was around 3 years old. In this first few years of my life I would say I didn't have my parents. I told you my father was arrested, but I didn't tell you that my mother was a teen mom and that she had me at 18 years old. From her own words she didn't know what to do, she didn't know how to be a mom to a child she didn't want to have. As she tell it my father shamed her into keeping me so she did.

She also told me what she struggled with when I came into the picture. She didn't have her parents either, her mother passed away from AIDS in 1996 and her father wasn't around for awhile until his death in 2004. She was living in and out of group homes and shelters with me, and having a baby father who begged you for a child not being around because he's locked up all just became too much for her.

Still a infant she sent me down South Carolina to my great grandmother who raised me until I was about 2 1/2 almost 3 years old. Down south I was around majority of my family my great grandma had about 9 kids. Each of her kids have about 2 or more kids who had 3 or more kids if you know where I'm leading to I have a huge family. I was raised in this big blue house with nothing but lands of grass almost like a farm. Honestly that's my safe place in my mind when things was simple, before life took a turn REALLY early in my life. The big blue house is a like a breath of fresh air when I think about it.

My mother was the first one in her generation to have a child so I was everybody "first born". I say that because literally I was everybody first kid a lot of my older cousins will tell me stories about how some of them would get girls because females would think they was my father lol. Or a few of my aunts telling me I used to live with them and they will spoil me unconditionally.