Concealed Identity (Completed) [R-18]

8 : The Whisper

Pinipilit niya parin akong tanungin kahit alam niyang wala akong balak sabihin 'to sa kaniya. I need to get out now kung hindi ay matatagusan ulit ako.

I did not speak for a whole minute. Doon ko lamang naramdaman ang pagluwag ng pagkakahawak niya sa akin. His grip loosened and I took that chance to slip away. Agad akong tumalikod sa kaniya at naglakad na paalis. Ni hindi ko manlang nakuha iyung napkin sa kaniya. I am already frustrated because I know I really need to wear a napkin. Matatagusan agad ako nito dahil parang gripo na 'tong pekpek ko at ang dami ng lumalabas na dugo.

Bakit ba kase kailangan pang reglahin ang mga babae?

Men don't but why does women?

Lumabas na ako ng grocery store na walang binili at diniretso ang daan pabalik sa boarding house ko.

Ayoko ng maabutan pa ako ni Gigs. Halos hindi na nga ako makahinga pa ng maayos dahil sa samusamot emosyon na nararamdam ko.

I took out my keys as I walk faster to reach the door of my boarding house when I saw him coming.

I panicked as I inserted my keys. Agad na sana akong papasok ngunit nadatnan niya ako. He inserted his arm on my door to give him access and pushed the door to allow himself welcome inside my place.

I looked at him with disbelief.

" Please Gigs. Please don't meddle with me. Huwag mo na akong pakialaman pa dito" I begged but he just shook his head.

" Hindi naman ata patas iyun, Iza. You meddle with mine but you don't want me to meddle with yours. You cannot just invade my whole system and target my heart just to make me this crazy. That is not fair!" Shock is an understatement of what I have felt the moment he told mw those words.

" Then forget it, Gigs! Forget me. Madali lang naman gawin iyun diba? Almost three years Gigs. Tatlong taon, ngayon ka pa ba magkakaganyan?" I hated what I've said but there's no other way to let him give up.

" Because you hid it well, Iza. You did not give me a reason to question your identity not until now." He muttered as he stepped nearer to me. His other hand was holding a paper bag. I don't need to open it for me to know what's inside.

" Then forget it please. Let's just forget this has happened and move on" Napameywang na ako. We seemed like we are both in a very critical situation. At ayokong narito ako sa apat na sulot ng boarding house ko kasama siya.

" My life will not be long enough to forget you, Iza" I sighed as I look at him hopelessly.

" Strip naked in front of me Iza and prove to me you're a man " His voice was cold and raspy.

" No " I told him. He answered me with a ghost smile.

" You can't because you're a woman" He said with so much assurance.

" I told you I am NOT a woman, Gigs " Pilit ko paring sinasabi sa kanya.

He smirked. Pagod na akong makipagtalo pa sa kanya.

" You want me to believe that?" He countered.

" Yes " I almost didn't even hear my own voice.

" Then fucking strip Iza. Huwag yung binabaliw mo ako ng ganito dahil kulang nalang aminin ko na sa aking sarili na nagmamahal ako ng bakla" His voice now was filled with frustration and anger.

" I will NOT strip in front of you, Gigs. I will NOT" Wika ko bago ako takhang aalis ng tumayo siya para pigilan ako.

" Are you going to wait for me to do it myself, Iza? Because I am in that very thin line of doing it now." He muttered. I looked at him with my eyes filled with no emotion.

I removed his hand on my wrist.

" You are wasting your time on the wrong person, Gigs. May problema ngayon si Shannon. You're supposed to be with him now." I told him but he answered me with the most unexpected one.

" I fucking have a problem too Iza. Tell me, how can I help a friend solve his problem when I can't even solve mine" Wika niya sa akin. Ramdam ko ang kakaibang emosyon sa kanyang boses. He is desperate.

" Ano bang makukuha mo sa ginagawa mo ha Gigs. What benefit will you receive in doing these things?" I asked him.

He straightly looked at me in the eyes before speaking once more.

" You. I am doing this because I want to formally have you" Honesty was evident in his voice.

" Are you hearing yourself, Gigs. Lalaki ako" I defended. I was lying.

" Then prove to me. Noon kulang nalang ay maghubad ka na sa harapan ko. Bakit hindi mo magawa gawa iyan ngayon? Strip naked Iza. It's not as if I'm going to fuck you." He muttered. Rawness was already in his voice as I succumb myself to total anxiousness.

" Ano Iza? Hindi mo kaya? You can't do it because admit it. You are a woman" Determinado na niyang wika sa akin.

" I am not a woman Gigs. I'm gay" I said with finality.

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Updated : April 30, 2020 Thursday 6:00 PM