Greek Myths: A Retelling of The Most Famous Myths

Poseidon, Hades and Demeter: sea brat, mr. Dark and Romantic, Mother grain

I just want to say two things. First, I forgot to mention that Hera tried to overthrow Zeus and got help from many gods and goddesses but failed. We'll go in way more detail on that in a later chapter but for now that's all you need to know. Second, I searched up Hera and Zeus' children since last chapter I said I couldn't remember how many kids they had. They have four kids. There is technically a 5th child but in many tellings this child was only Hera's because she got pissed about something but, again, that's for another chapter since that's more of the child's story than Hera's. Besides we're not here for Hera, we're here for Poseidon, Hades and Demeter; Zeus and Hera's siblings. Let's begin.
Poseidon is the god of the sea. If you remember from the first chapter, he was given this title after the war against the titans ended. He's also considered the god of horses since in one myth he created the first horse. Poseidon has also gotten a lot of spotlight on him since he's been referenced in shows like Spongebob and movies like Percy Jackson and the Olympians, which is also a book series. Here's the thing though, neither of these things show the true Poseidon. In Spongebob he's a pretty blank character that doesn't show up often to even have depth but in PJO he is given way too much justice. Okay, first off there are a lot of things I don't like about PJO. I'm not saying it's bad but there are cold hard facts for certain parts of Greek mythos, yes I know I said everyone is right but there are just some things that are just dead wrong. I'll talk about this in a future chapter along with the Perseus myth since that is what PJO is obviously based off of. But I do need to talk about Poseidon, more of how he's portrayed in the first movie since that's all of I've seen( I forgot there was a second one). First of Poseidon is married to a sea nymph named, Amphitrite, in the mythos. Even though he was married he had many lovers; both female and male. Which side note I'm amazed at how many people hate bi people today but over a thousand years ago people worshipped a bisexual cheat. His most memorable affairs don't include giving birth to the demigod Perseus because he was not the father of Perseus, Zeus was. Poseidon did have sex with his granddaughter once which produced a baby. Wow that baby must've been so confused.
"Great grandpa- I mean daddy can you and grandma read me a story." This also technically makes Poseidon his own grandfather. Poseidon also pretended to be a man some women was in love with to have sex with her and that produced one or two children. Then there was that time he RAPED a girl. Yes raped and how did he repay her? He granted her her wish(aw)...... to become a MALE warrior. Wow he definitely didn't scar her. Poseidon is also, in my opinion, a big cry baby. When he doesn't get what he wants he sulks back into the ocean or throws some big hissy fit that nearly wipes out an entire city-state. Of course he isn't as bad as Aries, no one is, but still Poseidon is still a whiny little bitch. There is one last thing I want to mention, when Hera tried over throwing Zeus Poseidon was one of the gods who helped. When Zeus was handing out punishments for this high act of treason, Apollo, Poseidon's nephew and Zeus' son, and Poseidon were assigned to build a wall to surround Troy(remember this wall for later chapters).
Now moving on to Hades. Hades, despite popular belief, isn't a bad guy and he isn't in charge of hell. Hades is the god of the underworld but he isn't the greek's version of satan. You see the Greeks had big fears about death. This is why Hades and his domain were so dark and gloomy but the Greeks did believe in some sort of heaven. You just needed to go to the same place to get to it as you would hell. this, of course, was the underworld. Picture heaven and hell as separate room in a house. You see Hades is given a bad rep because well, he rarely gets sunlight and he's surrounded by death, he isn't the biggest ray of fuckin sunshine. That's the reason he chose the wife he did, of course that caused a big mess. But hey at least he doesn't cheat like his brothers. You see Hades is actually seen more fair than evil, which is a good thing considered he decides where to put people's souls. You see Disney totally got Hades wrong. I mean Disney's Hades is good cartoon villain wise but still kids will be shocked later on to learn that if the Greek gods went to high school Hades would just be that emo kid who's pretty nice to everyone. We'll get more into Hades when we get to more of his myths and I'm planning to do a chapter on the underworld sooo... Ya moving on.
Lastly, Demeter, goddess of Agriculture, fertility, sacred law and the harvest. Demeter wouldn't fit my if the gods went to high school thing because that's how much her personality revolves around being a mother. The only myth that everyone knows her for is about her most famous daughter, Persephone. We'll get more into this myth when talking about Persephone but all you need to know is when Persephone went missing a huge famine happened to the humans because Demeter was really distraught over it and depressed. She has seven children other than Persephone, but we'll get more into them in a later chapter. But wholly crap eight kids in all! Damn that is crazy. She makes sure all the humans have food and had time to do it with 5 other guys(Wikipedia states she was never married to anyone but did it with 5 guys) to have eight babies! Wow. You would think having eight kids more than one would be remembered more. This is all I have on Demeter guys. Hoped you liked this chapter and will update soon.