You Got It Bad

Reality

I’m nuzzled securely under my covers, my head pounding. Damion had called but I couldn’t answer. I texted him that I was tired and I hadn’t checked to see if he had texted back. I heard the sound of the front door creaking open and I opened my eyes. I could hear the sounds of footsteps and I sat up slowly. “Danielle? Are you okay?”

I feel relief wash over me at Crystal’s voice, glad that it was her and not Damion. “No, I’m terrible…I feel like shit.” I groan out before lying back down. She walks in and climbs onto the bed with me. “What’s wrong? You haven’t been sick since…well, high school.” I shrug.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’ve had an upset stomach for a while but I thought I probably ate something bad but then I started throwing up and I can’t seem to hold anything down. I think I have the stomach flu…”

Crystal stays silent and I look up at her,” What?” She shrugs but the look on her face says so much. I can’t help but sit up. “What? What’s wrong?” She sighs.

“How is your sex life?” I blink, “Huh?” She sighs, “You tell me about Damion all the time and you guys are together…a lot…I mean, how often do you guys, well, you know.”

I smirk, “How often do we do it is what you’re asking.” She nods. “What does that have to do with anything?” She scratches her head in a thoughtful way, “Are you pregnant?” I sputter a little, choking on my words.

“What! No, of course not! We always use protection, always!” I quickly retort. The thought of being pregnant terrified me. Things were finally going my way and then this happens. “You guys always use protection…are you sure? I mean everyone makes mistakes. Are you sure you guys didn’t slip up one time in the heat of the moment or something?” I bite my bottom lip nervously, absentmindedly my hand travels to my stomach and pure fear clouds my mind. Oh, no. I shake my head. Denial is on the tip of my tongue but as I think back on all of our heated moments I can’t always vouch for the use of protection. 

“Crystal, I can’t be pregnant. I have the stomach flu!” I shout at her, I’m on the verge of tears as I feel the bed move as she stands up. I look at her through teary eyes, “I can’t be.” She crosses her arms, “Come on. We’re going to the store.” I pull the covers off and slowly get out of bed; I already know what the store will hold.

We slip out of my apartment and into her car. As we park I feel butterflies creep up and I swallow. She glances at me with worried eyes. “Don’t worry, I’m here and I’ve got you, okay?” I nod appreciatively. We exit the car and head inside the pharmacy together, as we walk down the aisle my breathing quickens. Anxiety seeps through my skin like lotion and I feel a cold sweat coming on. Suddenly I’m face to face with different brands of pregnancy tests and I begin to hyperventilate. Crystal glances at me and grabs my hand, squeezing it gently. I take a deep breath. “Wh…which brand do…do we buy?” I stutter nervously. She licks her lips. “I have no idea, maybe we should just grab a few and you can test them all out?” I nod, “That sounds like something that would happen in a tween movie.” I chuckle anxiously. She forces a smile before grabbing four different brands.

Once we paid for them the ride back to my place felt long and tiresome. She parked and we walked into the apartment in silence. I gulp before heading straight to the bathroom. I struggle to open the packets but eventually succeed and I begin the somewhat tedious trail on all four tests. I walk out of the bathroom when I’m done, “How long do we wait?” She shrugs, “Didn’t you read the instructions?” I shake my head and she sighs. “We’ll wait like five minutes and then we’ll check.” The minutes seem to tick by slowly as I pace my living room floor, my nerves are on the edge and I don’t know if I should fall to my knees and cry or just have a crazy fit of laughter.

Crystal pulls me out of my daze, “How long have you had an upset stomach?” I close my eyes, trying to remember when it started. “Three weeks ago but I didn’t start throwing up until two days ago.” She stands up abruptly. “It’s been more then five minutes, let’s see the results.”

I pick up the first test and my heart drops. There’s a plus sign. I gulp. Crystal bits her lip, “This one says you’re pregnant.” She whispers.

I pick up the second one, hoping for a negative symbol but instead I’m greeted with a smiley face. I can literally feel the color draining from my skin. Crystal stays silent as I pick up the other two and they both read positive. My eyes well up with tears and I turn to Crystal stunned.

“He’ll hate me…-” I hiccup in between sobs, “He wants freedom and I’ll be taking that away!” Crystal hugs me and I cry on her shoulder, my tears staining her shirt. “I’m not ready for this!” I scream out in tears.

She rubs my back, “I know you’re scared but you have to tell him and you need to go to the doctor to make sure.” I shake my head and pull away from her embrace. “I can’t tell him. I can’t…” I grab the tests and throw them all into the mini garbage can. She looks at me with a crazy expression on her face. “What do you mean you can’t tell him? You have to tell him!”

I glance at her, “I’m scared…I’m terrified. Things were just beginning to work out for me and then this happens.” I lean against the wall and let out a dejected breath.

Crystal gives me a small smile, “At least you know that your baby will have good genes…He or she could have dimples.” I can’t help but smile back.

“You’re not helping.” I smile wider. She laughs but it soon stops, “But you know you have to tell him, right? You can’t hide this from him, ya’ know.” I lick my suddenly dry lips.

“I know…I’ll tell him.”

She makes a face, “When are you planning on telling him?”

I glare at her, “I said I’d tell him and I will! You’re really pushing it…I’ll tell him when it feels right.” She tilts her head and looks at me skeptically but then she nods. “Okay.”

I silently touch my stomach and the image of a child growing inside once again stuns me. Crystal grabs my arm, “Come on, let’s binge watch Hulu and Netflix and eat some ice cream.” I smile a little. “One pity party coming right up!”