Kissing in a Dream

Waiting for the Light

"Are you free for lunch, P?" Tes messaged me.

Though I thought it would be easy to ignore what I was feeling for him, it wasn't. He was charming, handsome and so damn smart—how could I?

But I wouldn't chase him. I'd hold on to the friendship we seemed to have. I cleared my throat and tossed my leg over my motorcycle. "I can be. Where and when?"

He didn't reply right away so I started on my way to shower. I'd spent the entire night at the hospital and hadn't slept much the night before that. As I pulled up to my gate, Tes scrambled from his car and held up a bag with food.

I smiled under my helmet and eased to a stop. I flipped the visor up and he walked over.

"Sawatdee, Khrap." He smiled.

"The neighbours will start talking, Tes." I joked. "This is the second time you've brought me food."

His cheeks reddened and I smiled. "Are you staying this time."

Tes said nothing. He merely stared at me.

"I hate eating alone." I admitted. "Are you staying?"

"Chi, P."

"Pull your car into the front yard." I revved the engine and hit the remote to open it. Once it did, I rolled my cycle in and to the side which gave Tes a place to set his vehicle.

We walked into the house and I set the food down. "Let me take a quick shower—make yourself at home."

I headed for the stairs but stopped to watch Tes. He looked around then walked over to look at a picture of myself and Wolf. It was the first picture we'd ever taken together. Wolf was grinning, his mouth covered in peanut butter.

I smiled and carried on with my plans. By the time I returned, Tes had set out plates, spoons and forks as well as glasses of water. He'd taken the meal out of the bag and served them in bowls, ready to be shared.

"You are very domesticated." I laughed.

"That's not funny, P." But he smiled anyway. "I wanted to help you. I think you've been spending your nights at the hospital. Your uncle wouldn't approve of you making yourself ill."

"What about you?" I asked, sitting and picking up my fork and spoon.

"I'd be very angry at you too." Tes placed some rice into my plate then followed it up with ginger and pork. "Eat and stop asking questions."

I laughed, shared some food into his plate then did as he said. We talked about things, things that had nothing to do with Anurak or Wolf. Though I loved Wolf dearly, it was good to have a conversation about books and things I liked.

"How's school?" I asked.

"We are off for the Christmas break." Tes replied.

"Are you spending it with your parents?" I asked.

"No. You've met my sister." Tes picked up a string of ginger and popped it into his mouth. "My parents are abroad. They will send us gifts, but Lala and I have stopped opening them two years ago. Then, maybe, they'll give us a call. Other than that, it's been Lala and I. What about you?"

"I don't know. I usually spent it with Wolf. My uncle has never been a celebrating holidays kind of man."

"You must really love Wolf."

I smiled and nodded. "Yes. He's kind and in my life, there had been very few people who even took a second look at me."

"I doubt that. You're very handsome." He then quickly grabbed his water and drank quickly.

I smirked and bowed my head. My cheeks heated. "Well, people barely look to begin with. Whether I'm handsome or not, they would notice. Since we both have no Christmas plans, how about we spend it together—with Lala and Wolf, that is."

"Of course." Tes wiped his mouth. "I'll ask my sister."

We finished our meals then sat around talking. I could tell something was bothering Tes. During lulls in the conversation his eyes turned sad.

"Nong?" I called.

He said nothing.

I touched his shoulder and he almost jumped.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"I'm fine." Tes inhaled deeply, his shoulders remained up until he exhaled. "My parents left my sister and I to clear out our grandmother's things. We haven't had time to mourn her death. Since we have school, Lala and I have been slow to get everything done. My sister found a box under our grandmother's bed."

I shifted to sit on the center table so I could face him.

Tes dropped his eyes to his fingers and I smiled. "Go on."

"It has things in it that seems to suggest that either Lala and I have a brother or sister." Tes swallowed and looked into my eyes. "Or, and uncle or an aunt."

"Maybe the child died and it's too hard to talk about."

"But we deserve to know we had another part of ourselves that was breathing." Tes licked his lips.

I trembled.

"We want to know this member of our family." Tes continued. "The thing is, we can't ask grandmother or grandfather because—well—they're gone."

"How about your parents?"

"They left Thailand and I don't think they planned to return." Tes rubbed the back of his neck. "That's why I've been working so hard. I want to be a doctor so I can take care of myself and my sister without any help from them. It's like our grandparents were the only things keeping mom and dad here."

I reached over and held his shoulder. "Do you need any help from me?"

"You have enough on your hands." Tes told me. "Deal with the whole situation with Wolf and his father first. Maybe ask afterward."

"Are you sure?"

"Um..." He dropped his eyes again.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Well..."

"Don't be shy, Tes. Speak your mind."

"Could you—there is something you can do to help me." Tes inhaled and looked up again.

"Name it."

"A hug?"

I laughed softly but stopped when I realized he wasn't joking. Kneeling in front of him, I drew Tes into my arms. I used a hand to push the back of his head until he was resting it against my shoulder, his warm breath bathing my skin, turning me on more than it should.

"I do have some connections, Tes," I managed. "Do you want me to look into this baby for you?"

He pulled back. "You would?" Tes' brows shot up.

"Yes, but you may not like the answers."

"Just because its terrifying doesn't mean I shouldn't do it." Tes lifted his chin. "I may have a brother or a sister—or an uncle or aunt. I want to know that person even if they don't wish to know me."

"Okay. I'm going to hug you again. Afterward, you can give me some information and I'll start searching."

"Another hug?" Tes asked. "I'll take it."

I smiled and drew him to me again.