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He really shouldn't have let his emotions carry on this far. He knew Anakin was married, how could he not. Anakin never mastered the art of subtlety. Still, he never mastered the art of telling Anakin "no." It wasn't that he didn't want him, because oh, how he ached for Anakin every second of the day. The only problem was Obi-Wan knew he wasn't who Anakin couldn't wait to see once they were back on Coruscant. He wasn't the one Anakin would run to for the nights spent there, the one he would make excuses to see. In all honesty, there was no reason Obi-Wan should feel this intense level of jealousy. He spent more time with Anakin than not, and he wasn't the one married to him.

He had tried to stop them, but every time Anakin barged into his room, pulled him into his own, or cornered him in an empty hallway, all protests died in his throat. Again, it wasn't a matter of consent, it was a matter of jealousy. He wanted Anakin to ache for him the way he did. He wanted Anakin to feel the pull in his chest as he watched Obi-Wan share tender moments in the arms of another, to feel the anguish he felt every time he saw Anakin with the Senator.

Oh, the guilt he felt. It wasn't just because Anakin was married, but also the fact that he married Padme, one of the few politicians that held his full trust. A very close friend.

One night, Padme had invited them both over for dinner, coincidentally after a long and rough night of passion. It was one of the few they shared on Coruscant. One of the very few that Anakin had made an excuse to Padme  to spend time with Obi-Wan. Anakin had answered the comm, Obi-Wan had rolled under the sleeper, accepted the invitation to dinner, and then Obi-Wan's comm rang and they switched positions. If Padme noticed Anakin's limp that night at dinner, she hadn't mentioned anything. Anakin had gone to the refresher, the drinks getting to him, so Obi-Wan chatted with Padme.

"Honestly, Obi-Wan, I truly value our friendship. Anakin does too, he just has a strange way of showing it. You're all I hear about from him on a normal day," Padme had said. Obi-Wan had probably responded with a thanks, a joke about Anakin, and laughed with Padme, but one thought burned brightly in his mind.

"Would you still hold me in such a high regard if you knew what I did to your man last night?"

It was unsettling for him to even be thinking this. He couldn't be bitter towards Padme, they were too close, bonded over the events on Naboo so long ago, and she was too sweet. He could see how Anakin had fallen for her. It was obvious that she was physically attractive. Beautiful, some might say. But beneath her skin, in the core of her personality, she was fiery. She was commanding, but she had a graceful and delicate aura about her that would fool anyone into thinking she was dainty and truly, only a lady. Obi-Wan might have believed it if he hadn't seen her skills with a blaster on the battlefield.

Anakin hadn't spent the night that night, surprisingly or unsurprisingly. Obi-Wan must have worn him out. They slept in the same bed once more. Obi-Wan had started to realize he slept better with Anakin in the bed with him. Also a troubling revelation.

He had known Padme was pregnant long before his visit to her apartment. He could sense the twins, burning so brightly in the Force like their father. Obi-Wan wasn't sure how Anakin hadn't felt them, though maybe their signatures were drowned out by his own supernova.

Obi-Wan had apologized, but didn't specify what he was apologizing for. A mere "I'm sorry," was all he said. He was apologizing for Anakin, how he had left the one he loved, his children, in the pursuit of power. He was apologizing for not training Anakin better, for not teaching him to let go the way he should have. He was apologizing for allowing Anakin's infidelity, for taking part in said infidelity, and never once saying anything. He never said any of those words, though, and simply walked away.

It was ironic how he was the one to see Padme last, hold her children, watch her take her last breath, be in the delivery room. As he held Anakin's children, he swore to protect them, to never let the Dark Side touch them the way he allowed it to corrupt Anakin.

Senator Organa, another one of the few politicians he trusted, had adopted Leia. A good fit. Perhaps she would grow to be a powerful leader like her mother, like her adoptive parents. Bail had insisted that Obi-Wan come visit, but Obi-Wan had claimed it was safer if he didn't. Bail had made it known that he wouldn't let Leia be raised without knowing about him, her Uncle Obi-Wan, as Anakin would have insisted they call him. He idly wondered, if Anakin hadn't turned, if he was still here and Padme was still alive, if their relations would have continued. If Anakin would make excuses to spend the night at the Temple. Surely, Anakin would have left the Order following his children's birth. Maybe he wouldn't have left, and he would still share a bed with Obi-Wan, using the fact that he was a Jedi to stay at the Temple with him.

Luke, however, he had taken to Anakin's family on Tatooine. His stepbrother, Owen Lars. He had briefly explained to them that Anakin had died, and this was his son, Luke. He had also explained that it was safer for him not to raise Luke, but would remain on-planet to watch over him. He saw Shmi's grave, and though he had not met the woman, wept. He apologized for failing her son, failing her. Anakin was free but now he was a slave to Palpatine. Owen and Beru looked away, realizing Anakin's death must have been tragic. Obi-Wan had mentioned something about it being his fault, and Owen had taken it to heart. He hadn't known Anakin that well, but Shmi would always tell stories of her son, conceived by some mystical Force, that was now a free man, a Jedi. Owen had admired Anakin in a way that younger brothers do, even if he had never truly met the man. A brief visit was not meeting someone. He had loved Shmi as his mother, as well. Owen decided that whoever was responsible for Anakin's death, for his stepmother's star to burn out, was not welcome in their house. Beru hadn't said anything, but she felt the same. As she held Luke, she nearly cried at the misfortune that must have happened to render him completely parentless.

Obi-Wan sits in his hut now, contemplating what he could have done differently. Wishful thinking was not something the Jedi did, but the Jedi were dead now, weren't they? The dreams had started a while ago, and it was almost like a drug. Every time he slept, he was back in the heat of the Clone Wars. When he woke, he sobbed, living his regrets.

He had taken to sitting out on the dunes to attempt meditation. It never worked. When he was left alone in his thoughts, he travelled back to the nights with Anakin.

"Oh, Anakin," he croaked wistfully one day, tears in his eyes, "When will it end? Every time I close my eyes, I'm somewhere with you."

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