the star | jinji

Chapter Fourteen

"I just want to be honest to you. I owe you this explanation for years now, I just kept delaying it. Now that fate made us meet up again? I completely know that there's no turning back now." I took a step closer to him and stared at his eyes.

I offered my hand to him. He looked at my hand and then back at me. "Can you do me a favor and hold my hand? Just... for now. I need to have strength to tell you everything and holding your hand would be a big help." I tried to suppress my smile as he intertwined our hands together. Our hands fit together perfectly, it's as if our hands were made to be together.

"Remember when I never stopped wearing long sleeves? There was a time that I never worse skirts or dresses during our dates. I know you have noticed that, there's even a time when you asked me why I have a bruise on my face." I looked away as I remember everything that happened.

I was walking aimlessly to the coffee place where I would be meeting with Jinyoung. My body feels like it's going to break anytime soon. I looked at my clothes and sighed. I'm wearing a long sleeves sweater and it's already summertime. I hope Jinyoung won't ask.

"Jisoo!!!"

I looked up and everything that's been clouding my mind immediately went away when I saw Jinyoung smiling and waving at me. I immediately ran and hugged him. I needed his hug. I am just... so drained.

"Hey..." Jinyoung gently held my face and I yelped when I felt a scorching pain as he made me look up at him. "Why... do you have a bruise on your face? Did someone..."

My eyes widened as I realized that I was... punched on the face.

"I was just clumsy and fell down." I laughed nervously. "Got hit on the face because of that."

I was so nervous, he kept on asking me what happened, but I tried to shrug it off.

"I was being abused, Jinyoung." Then and there, I felt my whole body shaking in fear. Everything that happened to me before flashed into my mind. Everything is flowing into my mind. I feel so fucking scared and vulnerable. Tears starting to flow from my eyes.

I felt Jinyoung tightened his hold on my hand as soon as he heard what I just said. He stared at me as if he was so mad at what he just heard.

"I was so vulnerable, Jinyoung. It fucking killed me because I never had the chance to defend myself. I was so scared. It started when I was eight and... it went on for ten years. I can't escape and it was hell. As soon as I turned eighteen, I left my home. Without anything planned, I left my hometown. I was scared as hell, I was lost." I smiled bitterly, trying to stop myself from crying. My hands are shaking badly which made Jinyoung hold my other hand, he rubbed our hands together, trying to make me calm down.

"And then I met you. I lived happily and having you in my life? I realized how lucky I am that I met someone like you. Everything was going on smoothly. I started college and you went to join the company to reach your dreams. I just thought that everything is finally going right... But of course, I was wrong."

I tightened my hold onto Jinyoung's hand. My heart feels like it's going to burst any time soon. Remembering everything that happened, I started to have a hard time breathing. I hit my chest three times, trying to breathe. I feel so suffocated. I saw how alarmed Jinyoung is, his tears falling, and he didn't know what to do.

I smiled at him even if I'm having a hard time already. "I'm... okay."

Jinyoung looked at me, "You're not! Let's stop talking about this, I don't want to see you having a hard time like this."

I immediately shook my head. "I... have to finish this... and forget it completely."

"But—,"

"Please..." I begged.