Shut Up, Padfoot!

13

I nodded, side eyeing Sirius. His interest piqued when I said his name. He cleared his throat, paying more attention to the conversation he was just in. He flicked Peter's forehead, the latter whining and holding the area.

"Where are you going, Cry?" Prongs countered.

I paused, wondering if I should tell him. This whole time, I haven't told any of the Marauders about Pandora and her great grandmother. I barely have given any details involving Tom Riddle either. They don't know much. And I plan to keep it that way.

"Back to the orphanage. Only got a couple more years left until I leave. I want to spend some time with the little ones before then," I lied.

"You can't be serious? You never have fun in your summers," James complained.

"Dum dum.. I'll tell you all about it and you can coo about how cute the stories of the kids will be," I defended.

"No.. Fawkes, don't do this. Not in front of them... they can't know," he whispered.

"We're all in the same compartment. We can hear your conversation, you know?" Moony interjected.

James fell in the same ashamed position again. I snickered, slapping Remus' shoulder at the comment. He pushed me away from him, chuckling.

The train began to slow down, meaning this was going to be goodbye.

My laughs quieted and my smile faded. I don't know how the summer will turn out. I don't know if I'll come back as the same person. What if I don't come back at all?

The others gathered their things, making me get up and do the same. Without any words, we made our way out of the compartment and down the train.

Padfoot's back was in front of me and I watched him run a hand through his hair. He pulled his luggage behind him and glanced through every other compartment. He does that every year. He looks to see if anyone forgot anything on the train, willing to return it to their owner before students leave the train station. So far, it's only happened a couple times last year.

This year no one left anything. I stepped down the train steps after he was completely down. He turned, quickly making eye contact with me. I flushed, inwardly cursing myself for staring at him the whole time.

"So, mates.. this is until September," Padfoot declared.

"Until September," Prongs said.

"Until September!" Wormtail exclaimed.

"Until September, you all," Moony repeated.

I blinked, watching their eyes travel towards me. I choked up, my fingers turning white as I tightened my hold on the handle of my luggage. They waited for me to repeat it. I cleared my throat, lowering my eyes.

"Until September..." I mumbled.

"Aw, are you feeling sad? It's only a couple months, Fawkes! You'll see us then," Prongs reassured.

Sirius pulled me into a side hug, rubbing my arm to cheer me up. He chuckled, "Come on.. you never cry when we part for the summer. Just look forward until we're all together again."

"It's not like we'll disappear suddenly. We'll be okay," Moony told.

Remus pat the side of my head, tucking some hair behind my ear afterward. My eyes welled up with tears and I tried swallowing back the lump in my throat.

There's a chance I might never come back.

"Don't worry, be happy!" Wormtail prodded. He pressed a finger into my cheek, pushing up the side of my mouth to replicate a smile.