He doesn't do relationships. Neither does she. But they can't fight the attraction any longer...
Can Nate and Jillian help heal each other and revive the love in their lives that they've both been refusing to allow in for years? Or will they let the...
"Are you okay?" Jasmine came up behind me and placed her hand on my back.
It never failed to amaze me what the human touch was capable of. Sometimes it hurt and sometimes it loved. Jasmine's gentle touch was loving and it was exactly what I needed right now. It helped quiet the demons and after a couple of minutes, I had my breathing under control.
I turned to face her. "A man's lucky to have a woman like you in his life, sweet thing."
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"I'm always here for you, Nate. It hurts me to see you like this; I wish you would let me help you more."
I pulled her close. "You are helping me, babe. More than you know." I let her go so I could look at her in the eyes. "I've never really talked to anyone about this shit. I know I need to but I've gotta get my head ready first."
"I understand. Just remember that I'm always here when ever you need to talk."
"Thanks, darlin'."
The air was thick with the burden of ghost. This was why I hated digging up shit from the past. We both took a moment to deal with it.
Eventually, Jasmine smile at me before asking, "So, what are you going to do about Jillian?"
"I don't know what to do with that," I admitted.
"Okay, lets break it down. You slept together but then you pulled away and were a bastard to her, right?"
"Yeah." My guilt over that was tremendous but I hadn't been able to bring myself to apologise. Being near her made me want her even more.
"You pulled away because you're scared of your feelings for her, right?"
"Fuck, you make me sound like a pussy, Jasmine."
"Well, lets call a spade a spade, Nate. You men can be real dickheads when you feel something for a woman. And you're being one of the biggest dickheads around at the moment."
"Christ, If I wanted to hear this shit, I would have gone to my sisters, babe."
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"Sorry but you do need to hear this shit. For this first time in a long time, you're feeling something and I think it could be good for you. You hide you pain behind that mask you wear, Nate. I know, because I used to do it too. Sex helps numb it but it'll never go away until you deal with whatever pain has been crippling it for all these years."
She was right; I knew she was, but I didn't want to admit it. Shit, life was a lot easier to deal with when you ignored the pain and fucked it all away. Problem was, and she was spot on here, the pain always came back.
"I want her, like I've never wanted anyone."
Smiling, she said, "Good, we're getting somewhere. So are you willing to open yourself up to it?"
"Can't it just be sex?"
"I swear, its like pulling teeth with you, Nate. No, I don't think it can be. If it could, you two would already be doing that."
She had a point. "Shit," I muttered.
"Let me ask you something. How many women have you slept with since you and Jillian hooked up?"
Fuck, reckoning day was here. "None."
A huge smile landed in her face, "You've got it bad, Nate Hunter, and you don't even know it. You need to get your shit together, apologise to her and man the fuck up, dude."
I scowled at her. "I'm hearing you, babe. I'm fuckin' hearing you."
