𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 ✓

06

wooyoung was no where to be seen, as he had disappeared to his room for who knows how long. san wasn't even keeping track of it.

he only noticed when he was grabbing lunch, that wooyoung wasn't around.

'i guess he finally learned how to keep his distance, maybe that's why he was crying'

he thought to himself, finishing up his food before heading back to his own room. plain, boring, but quiet enough to be his.

his eyes moved around the room, slowly admiring the features of the small room. it wasn't very decorative, and only a bed, couch, and table remained inside.

san tried to find the room interesting, but the feeling of boredom was the only thing that he got from it. he was never bored, and never felt anything before, which is why he was confused as hell as to why he was bored.

_______________

a tear trickled down wooyoung's cheek, he sniffled and quickly wiped it away.

'why are you crying? he did this because of you. you shouldn't be allowed to cry.'

he repeatedly told himself this, making it known to himself. of course he never stopped crying though. the more he told himself these things, the more the voices in his head fought back.

'cry, loser. i died because i couldn't handle your stupid games anymore. you never got better, neither did i. we're both a disappointment to mom, woo.'

a similar voice like his, spoke to him. he knew it wasn't real, none of it was. it wasn't actually his brother either, but it felt so real to the point where he had no choice to believe it.

he wiped, yet another tear from his face, before hearing a soft knock at the door.

"i'm bored, do you want to entertain me?"

wooyoung froze, staring at the figure in front of him. someone really wanted a loser like wooyoung to entertain him?

impossible.

"i guess,"  wooyoung responded softly, his voice very low due to crying so much. he turned his head in another direction to wipe the rest of his tears, before the boy had taken a seat on wooyoung's bed.

"i don't think there's much i can do though, sorry.." he trailed off, sniffling once again and trying hard not to let out any tears.

"tell me why your crying, that could go somewhere." san suggested, hoping for wooyoung to agree.

"i... don't think i feel comfortable with that.." he confessed, which honestly he didn't. he didn't want to be the one to break out in tears in front of san. it felt too embarrassing.

"well if you wont tell me, ill find out myself." san gets up and tries heading for the door but something stopped him. wooyoung gently grabbed a hold of san's wrist knowing what he would do next.

"it's personal information san, the doctors won't tell you," wooyoung started, his voice shaky, "i just met you yesterday, you don't know me, so i really don't think you have the right to know why i was crying."

he sniffled, as he held his tears once more. something he was getting extremely good at.

wooyoung loosened his grip, and let go of san.  letting himself fall back onto his bed. san turned back around, and noticed the state wooyoung was in.

he looked as if his soul left his body, and for the first time, san saw wooyoung as a person with feelings. someone who went through a lot, and he could sense it.

he thought wooyoung might've been crying because of him, but the real reason, changed wooyoung completely. it broke wooyoung, and san couldn't understand why he wanted to know so bad. maybe it was just an act of boredom.

"sorry if i pushed it too far wooyoung. you don't have to tell me if you don't want to." san decided to join wooyoung, falling next to him on the bed.

"actually.." wooyoung stared at the ceiling, with teary eyes, trying to find the right words to explain this.

"have you ever lost something important to you? something that brings you happiness?" he asked, san closing his eyes for a moment to think.

"i have." he responded honestly, not knowing what wooyoung meant by this.

"let's just say that i lost something important to me, this something brought me happiness and made me who i am..." he sniffled, taking a deep breath. "and i blame myself completely. i don't believe i can be happy after today san. its not possible."

san looked to see the expression wooyoung held, emotionless. something san could relate to. maybe wooyoung, wasn't as bad as san thought he was. which is why, he would promise himself something, he would promise to wooyoung.

"what if, i tried making you happy, would i fail?" he asked curiously, receiving a confused look from wooyoung. "why would you waste your time on me?"

san sat up, and smiled for the first time in a while. he smiled at wooyoung reassuringly, enough for wooyoung to know that he could trust him.

"because, you deserve it. im not one to talk though, because i've been an ass to you since yesterday."

wooyoung giggled, "what?" san questioned, furrowing his eyebrows at the boy.  "you look so weird when you smile, i'm so used to you not smiling and ignoring me."

san noticed how wooyoung's face expression had changed when he said that.

"did it bother you that much?" he asked, but wooyoung shook his head. "i don't usually care what others think, but i assumed you were tired of me anyways."

san wanted to say he wasn't, but that was a lie. he was annoyed at first but not anymore. he removed himself from wooyoung's bed before ruffling the others hair.

"get some rest wooyoung, i can tell you need it." he said softly, before leaving wooyoung's room.

san noticed immediately when he first walked in, that wooyoung had dark circles under his eyes. he was spending his time crying, instead of sleeping and eating when needed.

he didn't know why, but it made him worry a lot about wooyoung. he suddenly didn't feel the need to be cold to him.

that's why, he decided that wooyoung is the only human being he would acknowledge. no one else would get his attention.

just wooyoung.