Life Of Your Butterfly

Good

I am the reason I get hurt
Told me not to think
But it didn't work
I gloat that I have good judgment of people
Then how on the Earth did I end up crying
On the day planned to celebrate
Why did my heart hurt
And why is not it going away
Told me not to reach out
Not until she admitted she was wrong
But the ugly emotions got the best of me
I am a fool to think she will respond to the reverse psychology
That's what I got to throw away my anger
Being a caring friend is my crime
Sent pieces of honesty last Monday
She didn't even grace me with a reply
When on the Fourth day (Today) we come
Face to face
She didn't even spare me a glance, let alone
any acknowledgment
despite knowing I was sitting a seat away.
Served me right when
I broke on my way back home when I thought
I could take it
Wanted to curl up in a corner
But couldn't afford to let others see me
So I sucked it up and took a deep breath
Put on a peacock mask
I smiled and smiled and smiled
Now I would pay the price the next morning
When my eyes would hurt 'cause they'd be too dry,
Puffed up and red with a bonus headache
What a beautiful tomorrow it was a day before
Now all that was left in the present
Seems just not worth the try
Because I was a fool to fall for it again
Thought she cared when my conscience called
against it
I don't understand what I am feeling right now
You tell me How I am supposed to.
Am I angry or satisfied or sad?
Or a pathetic person in general
To go for a toxic friend
When my cool front though it's breaking
All the ties
It backfired, I tell you without exaggeration
Because I feel too much and care for her
I feel so alone
I can't explain it in words.