16. The Epiphany

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The next three days elbowed one another out of the way.

Tashaya's sun rose seemingly for the sole purpose of giving way to Yansara's moon. My body healed. Kozima pouted and melted me to the bone in his embraces. We were afraid of Anastasia spying, but I put off finding a room in the city because of how attached I became to coming back to him after a day's work. I had weapons against thugs. I had enough copper to have my own bed. Yet every night was that one last night with Kozima I couldn't miss. Something important always waited for me there.

On the fourth night, Anastasia sent a note. I sneaked into the infirmary to meet her. She produced a roll of paper almost as plump as herself. Her eyes glistened with unspilled tears.

"Gala sang inside my heart," she announced. "The words flowed like waterfalls of truth."

I picked at a scab left by the barracuda to emulate her mood. My face creased in pain, tears welled, but I still couldn't trust myself to speak solemnly.

"Praise Gala," I whispered.

"May the Divines' hands guide us all," Kozima intimated to the floor.

I glanced at his feet too, involuntarily following his gaze. His feet were fine, it was the terracotta tiles his sandals trod upon that caused me problems.

I looked at terracotta--and his eyes swam up in my mind as vividly as if I were an inch away from his face. And with looking into his eyes always came the desire to kiss his eyelashes until he stopped squinting. They turned to gold or copper or wrought iron depending on the light and how hard I was working his mouth with mine.

Since I left the Temple, I didn't have a chance to gaze upon them during the day hours. Anastasia though, she peered at him shamelessly all morning and all day long. This realization stabbed me in the gut. Jealousy twisted my entrails into knots. If I didn't grab myself by the elbows, I'd have grabbed Kozima by the shoulders and kissed him right in front of her to show who he belonged to. And probably would have kneaded his crotch too. And a few other things to remove any last doubts.

"May I?" Kozima took the scrolls from Anastasia.

He unrolled the parchment with too much reverence for my taste. Did their hands touch? More than their hands? Was she still inviting him in the infirmary to 'help' her with the inventories?

I chewed my lips, biting away the dead patches of chapped skin lining the opening of the mouth. 'Dark line from kissing the swine,' Sharim had teased me last morning. I didn't repeat this witticism to Kozima. I also didn't hit Sharim for calling my sweetheart a bad name, because I felt ashamed. I was turning him into a boy who didn't even need to tie his belt. If Anastasia or any other women sensed the corruption in him... Gala have mercy. Maybe I should find a room in the city and stop stringing him along.

"It's beautiful," Kozima said, re-rolling the scrolls and handing them to me with a small nod.

I stashed them at the breast of my saree without looking. "Gala be praised. I'll let you know how it goes with the actor."

Kozima chewed his lips, even though they were smooth. He couldn't beg me to change my mind in front of Anastasia, because she didn't know about the scorpia assassin like we did.

But he thought of it, I could see it.

For his sake, I was careful when I returned to the theater for the evening performance. I even paid my entrance fee this time, even though they charged an exorbitant amount compared to my earnings.

***

Goosebumps pockmarked my arms every few minutes, and not thanks to yet another moving performance of the immortal classic, the Naktymyana.

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