I wonder if people around me know who you are.
I wonder if people around me know how broken I am.
I wonder if people around me know how much harm you do. How much harm you've done to me.
I wonder if dad or mom are proud of me.
Dad, I'm sorry, I couldn't solve the problem.
Mom, I'm sorry, I couldn't smile when the whole world was frowning.
I'm sorry for being so stupid.
BEN, I'm sorry for trusting you. I'm sorry for being as weak as you wanted me to be, and allow you to break my soul as much as yours desired.
I miss my friends so much, I miss my parents so much, I miss myself so much, I miss my life so much. But, as you said:
“Where are your friends now, Lexy? Where is your family now, Lexy? Where did your bravery go, Alexandra?”
What I'm writing right now seems mindless, lazy, stupid, meaningless, like what you tell me I am.
I feel so empty, I tend to forget my name. I tend to forget who I once was. I tend to forget I once was happy.
This is stupid, I should stop writing, BEN can find this, and destroy it.
I'm going to stop writing
Right now
He won't find it
He won't
I swear
YOU ARE READING
❁runs in the family➳BEN_Drowned❁
Fanfiction❝But you get nauseous now, as he speaks to you, such proper language for acts so cruel. He says: we all follow the rules, we can't very well go and break them now, can we?❞ -Amy In The White Coat, by Bright Eyes -published 14/01/2020-
