50 shades of gray

Chapter 6 - Upkeep

After we've finished our burgers, two more beers each, and are tucking into a shared pint of mint cookie ice cream, I feel myself coming down off my Christian Grey high. I've successfully managed to steer the conversation away from my newfound sex life and onto any other topic. First it's graduation then it's moving then it's on to Kate's new internship at the newspaper, then we talk about Kate and Ethan's family trip.

Anything to avoid Christian Grey. Anything to clear my head. Part of me wants to think about him, but the rational side knows I need to get him off my brain in order to think logically about whether I'm ready for this.

Signing the contract is a big commitment. Most of it seems fine to me — I can eat three times a day, I can remember the safe words, I can work out. Hell, I think I need to so I can keep up with him! I can even try to get eight hours of sleep a night. The things I really only hesitate on a few items: that I can't masturbate (though I've never done it before, why should I care); not being able to look him in the eyes (looking into them is so erotic, I just don't want to not be allowed to); and not being able to touch him (just because I want to touch him). Everything else seems if not reasonable than at least doable. I'll try anything once I figure and if something isn't working, hopefully we can discuss it.

An item from the contract pops into my head an I interrupt Kate while she's talking about the spa treatments she's considering on her trip.

"Have you ever been waxed?"

She just blinks back at me for a few moments, her mouth hanging open.

I clear my throat slightly. "You know, down there?"

"Why... Why do you ask, Ana?"

I shovel more Ben & Jerry's in my mouth, talking around the spoon. "You know, Christian might have mentioned he'd like that." See, I didn't say he did say it, just that he might have said it.

"To be completely honest, Ana, it hurts like holy hell."

I blanch. I knew it would hurt, but Kate has to be one of the toughest people I know. She would not admit to it hurting that much unless it was really bad.

"But it does make me more sensitive, so that's a plus." She smiles coyly at me.

My breath hitches trying to imagine being any more sensitive than I already am. I'm hyper-aware of Christian's underwear touching me every time I move. If I was any more sensitive, I'd be moaning and writhing right here on the couch. I blush at the thought of Kate seeing me like that.

"I recommend getting your legs, armpits, and bikini area done before going the whole hog. It's a big commitment to lose it all."

The upkeep for having sex seems far more involved than I'd anticipated. The underwear, the prophylactics, the hair removal... I had no idea. The only saving grace I suppose is that Christian's paying for all these incidentals. I'm not sure my bank account could handle that plus the suit I need to buy for interviews next week.

"How much does that all cost?"

"Well, we could go to a salon, it'd be..." Kate does some additions in her head I guess, then continues, "about $100 at a cheap-ish place. But we could do it with an at-home wax kit for $12."

I hiccup. "Would you do that for me?"

Her face takes on an expression I can't quite read.

"Sure, I have a kit in the bathroom under the sink, why don't you go get it." I hesitate. "We should do this now while you're good and tipsy, before you lose your nerve."

Begrudgingly, I make my way to the bathroom and look under the sink. Lo and behold, behind the tampons and next to the toilet cleaner is an at-home wax kit. I bring it back to Kate, who tells me to get a couple towels to cover the couch. I do as she orders and when I come back I hear the microwave beep.