Destiel Becomes Canon

Purgatory Take Two

Dean, a little stunned, let Benny take the lead. About ten yards away from the shed was a 6ft X 5ft patch if dirt. Benny buried a seed in the loose dirt and recited the incantation "Adulesco!"  A green stem began to sprout.

"Dude, how did you discover all this?"

"I was dating this witch a few years back. Picked up a few things."

A few minutes later, the flower bloomed a bright yellow.  Dean plucked it from the soil, wrapped it in a cloth, and stowed the flower carefully  in his pocket.

Benny planted himself on the dirt and sat criss-cross. He patted his "garden" inviting dean to sit down next to him. Dean looked around to make sure no one was watching and sat down in the same manner. His joints popped as he sat down, showing his age.

"What are we doing, man?" Dean asked.

"I said we were gonna solve two problems. Now what's goin' on with you and the angel."

"First Rowena, now you. Why is everyone obsessed with me and Cas?"

"Who's Rowena?"

Dean gave a gesture to indicate another long story, so Benny moves on. "Okay. So there's a lot I don't know. But I remember a Dean that flat out refused to leave this place without his buddy. And when I died again, the last tine I saw you, you were still that Dean. Still loyal and focused on all the right things. What's changed?"

"Everything. You weren't there, Benny. We've lost so much. Every win comes with a worse loss."

"That's life, brother. Wins. Losses."

"But it's always him." Dean looked over at Cas who had wondered off a few yards. Some markings on a tree interested him. "I lost Bobby who was like a father to me. I lost my Dad twice, my mom twice. And it's his fault. People keep leaving. And Cas is part of it. Every time."

"It can't always be Cas' fault. You couldn't look me in the eye and tell me that guy over there intentionally took everything you love."

"I know he doesn't mean it," Dean relented. " I never said he meant to do it. But should I just sit back and watch as it keeps happening?"

"Dean. Look around. Look at where you are. Who you're with.  I'd like to count myself among your losses, and I know Cas has nothing to do with that. It sounds to me like bad things happen, and the little guy takes the heat for bein' there."

"I lost my mom, man. He was responsible. I can't let that go."

"Again, brother.  That's life. You're in your forties. You were going to lose your parents anyway. But in all those losses you mentioned, who stuck around and put up with your ass?Made it back to you through purgatory? Through death even?"

"He only stayed because it's part of Chuck's story," Dean said, referencing the story he told Benny earlier.

"So what if he is? You said before that chuck put you in all these crazy situations but you got to choose how you act. How many times has Cas chose you?"

Dean wasn't completely convinced, but he was tired of talking in circles. They both stood up.

"Cas, buddy, we're leaving," Dean called. No answer. Cas was nowhere to be seen, and only six hours before the portal would close.

"C'mon. Maybe he went back to the shed," Benny suggested.

They checked the shed, but Cas wasn't there. They went around purgatory, Benny taking the lead. Night fell, so Dean and Benny made camp outside. Benny quickly fell into a comfortable sleep for the first time in years since Dean was there to keep watch.

Dean stared solemnly into the fire they built knowing well that it could attract monsters. Both men were beyond caring.

"Cas, you idiot." Dean absentmindedly prayed. "If we don't find you soon, we will have to leave without you. Is this the "moving on" you had in mind? Well if this is your idea of leaving, then you really are stupid. Chuck's ending will have to wait, because the world can't end like this. I'm going to keep coming back here until I find you. You're my family, Cas. I'm sorry if I've been a dick, but you should know better than to run away."

When Benny woke up, they made their way back to the portal. They got there a few minutes before it closed.

"Go on ahead. I'll meet you there," Dean told Benny. He gave Benny the daisy so Michael wouldn't smite him the minute he stepped through the door.

"Cas, please," Dean thought. Another prayer sent unintentionally.

Dean was about to give up. He turned to enter the portal when he heard Cas' voice behind him.

"My powers might be failing me, but I can still hear you."

"Cas..." Dean, just as he did during their last purgatory reunion, captured Cas in a big bear hug, the kind Dean so rarely offered. Unlike their last purgatory reunion, Cas returned the hug wholeheartedly.

Suddenly, Dean's relief turned to anger. "Where the hell did you go?" Against his will, a man-tear tolled down his cheek. "We just lost mom. Kevin. Jack. How could you leave when Sam and I need you most?"

"You blamed me, Dean. You wouldn't look at me. What was I supposed to do?"

"Damn it, Cas. You stay. I've been like this the whole time. You know the drill. I get hurt. I lash out. I say the wrong thing. I'm still doing it now. I- Damn it!"

And for the first time, Dean expresses his appreciation for Cas in the only way he could to get him to stay. In envelopes Cas into a kiss, soft and chaste, yet full of passion. Dean Winchester never could say "I love you" properly. Luckily, Castiel understands Dean better than anyone. He accepted Dean's kiss for everything it was. An apology. A declaration. A promise. So many problems were still before them, but for all of them, Cas would stay by Dean's side.

The end.