messages ; layhun

time for sexing

real__pcy :
oh my god
help

baekhyun :
what
did you stare at the mirror again?

real__pcy :
:O
moron

baekhyun :
ok srsly wht hppn

real__pcy :
can you do me a favor

baekhyun :
i swear if you ask me to be your fake grandma again i will sue you and your entire country

real__pcy :
but...
your country is my country...

baekhyun :
no
youre from chorea
im from rex orange country

real__pcy :
baek
are you on crack again
it physically hurt to read that

baekhyun :
>:(

real__pcy :
anyway
can you accompany me on spying xing hyung and sehun?

baekhyun :
VHAT
IM IN
WHAT SHOULD I DO

real__pcy :
OK OK SO THE THING IS
u kno what
lets make a group chat first

its time for sexing🔥✨🐥
real__pcy invited baekhyun, dokyungsoo, and kimjongdashian

do kyungsoo :
what kind of club is this

baekhyun :
what chANYEOL JONGIN IS STILL 51
WHAT R U DOING

kimjongdashian :
hyung

baekhyun :
o shid typo
i mean
HES STILL 5

real__pcy :
it's sehun's and yixing's ship name!
sexing!
im a genius

dokyungsoo :
yup i'll take my leave from this cult

baekhyun :
u wanted to leave because this cult is rivaling your cult

dokyungsoo :
spot on

real__pcy :
NO WAIT IM sERIOUS
this is a group for operation: get yixing and sehun be boyfriends and get married and buy chanyeol two teslas

dokyungsoo :
i was hooked until the last part

real__pcy :
i'll give one of the teslas to u

dokyungsoo :
aight so what's the plan

kimjongdashian :
hyung what about me

real__pcy :
i'll let you touch my tesla

kimjongdashian :
yeah! thanks hyung! you're the best!!

baekhyun :
he's an airhead

dokyungsoo :
that's you

baekhyun :
and you're an airbender

dokyungsoo :
what does that even mean

baekhyun :
it means you're avatar
you're aang

kimjongdashian :
he means you have no hair hyung

dokyungsoo :
YES I GET IT JONGIN
anywaYS FUC KYOU BAEKHYUN

real__pcy :
no no you're getting it wrong!
yixing hyung and sehun should be the ones doin the fu Cking

baekhyun :
why did u type it like that
and omg jongin close your eyes

kimjongdashian :
already did

baekhyun :
you know what that's even weirder
SO WHATS THE PLAN

real__pcy :
finAlLy
sooooo sexing are going on a date 2morrow
i know the place because yixing texted me about his romance life

dokyungsoo :
show off

baekhyun :
show off

real__pcy :
stop
and so theyre going to xxx cafe at 9

baekhyun :
9 am?

real__pcy :
yup
and i want us to spy on them in that cafe
we gotta used cool clothes like beanie and mask and stuff

dokyungsoo :
we're just going to look like we gonna rob 'em

real__pcy :
ok wear whatever that'll disguise you

baekhyun :
i'll wear a wig

real__pcy :
i am not surprised by that
anyways
and then we're going to listen to their conversation
and if they don't end up 2gether
i say we force them!

dokyungsoo :
idiot
you're forcing feelings

real__pcy :
ok not like that
but i mean
we gotta straight things up if they got into a quarrel instead of making out

dokyungsoo :
ok but none of this plan is remotely straight

real__pcy :
shut up kyungpoo

dokyungsoo :
OH YOU DARE?

real__pcy :
shid

baekhyun :
UUU IM SO EXCITED FOR TOMORROW

dokyungsoo :
you're just excited to finally wear your wig again

baekhyun :
well

real__pcy :
I'M EXCITED TOO
LETS HOPE FOR THE BEST

kimjongdashian :
show off
OH MAN IM LATE AGAIN :c
guys?
(read)

—
i'm sorry this chapter took 737818 years and is very cringy. hope you all have a good day~~