N
ick: *standby mode*
Kitty: *returns through her portal, dragging a reluctant Hancock*
John: *smashed outta his skull from Jet*
Kitty: *swats the back of Nick's head knocking his hat off then kicks Hancock between the legs to "encourage" him*
Nick: *rights his fedora, glaring at her. Nods towards Hancock* How was the break?
John: *cupping his crotch, as he lays on his back and lets out a blast of air, deflating like a whoopie cushion* Not sure, lemme check *tentatively feels for his bollocks, checking that they're in one piece*
Kitty: *pounces onto Nick's lap, she sits down haughtily, folding her arms*
Nick: Where's your friend?
Kitty: *shrugs and begins rolling herself a blunt* He's gone back to the time out box after our steamy lil tryst.
Nick: It wasn't exactly subtle, Kitty.
John: Nicky Noodle, I think you'll find that nothin' about this bullshit is subtle.
Nick: Never call me that again.
John: Why? Viv gets away with it.
Nick: That's... *appears vexxed*
Kitty: Ha! He's got ya there, n*gga!
John: Anyway, what did I miss?
Kitty: Fuckall! *lights her joint, taking a good few puffs on it before passing it to John*
Nick: James had a nightmare regarding Abbi, then wrote her a letter that made Fatal Attraction look like a well-balanced relationship.
Kitty: Which Bunny Boiler then sent to her, and her response was to stand him up.
John: Maybe it's just the Jet talkin' but I'm more surprised that Gerg-proxxy actually went outside to go meet a girl.
Kitty: I think we can agree though, that the entire chapter was pointless.
Nick: Correct.
Kitty: ... As is this one.
John: *takes a drag, monotone* Yay.
Nick: We skip the rest of his suspension, because reasons.
Kitty: Good! I didn't exactly wanna hear about him alternating between self-loathing angst and delusional optimism. Whilst masturbating feverishly.
Nick: *grimace* It would only be delusional if James knew he didn't stand a chance with her.
Kitty: Yeeeah... We'll get to that *glances at John, who appears dazed and a little pale. She manages to pry the joint outta his fingers, and takes a drag*
John: *shudders, coming back to reality* Hmm?
Nick: He arrives back at the school, which finally is given a name. I bring this up, because interestingly he uses the name of the high school that he went to.
John: Timmy's Special School For The Functionally Inept?
Kitty: *choked on the inhale* Fuck!
Nick: *smirks, correcting him* Lakewood High *returns to the spork* People are giggling at him as he walks in.
Someone screamed "Wuss! Learn how to fight!" behind me but I just kept walking.
Kitty: *sneaking back in through a portal, switching off her megaphone, looking smug*
YOU ARE READING
Topside: Realm of the Onion
Humor"'Consumed by sadness and the fallout of a now retreating fear.' That ought to be tagline for what it's like sporking this shit." ~KittyHP [A/N true to my word.] Sporking: Stones to Abbigale. A book so bad it misspells it's title character's name. A...
