Monster's (Gaara Love Story)

Chapter 21

Honestly, I'm still not able to get over Gaara, but I can't want to be with him when he gets married. It's not right, but if Sato may be the one to help me forget that I ever loved Gaara. I hope it doesn't sound bad but if I'm going to move on it might as well be with someone that actually likes me.

"See you tomorrow, right here at eight" He said smiling widely as he backed away from me. Not paying attention he bumped into a barrell knocking some things down in the process of trying to leave.

I laughed at his actions as he continued to stumble away. He's a really funny person.

Could he really pull me out of this dark hole that I dug myself into?

Making my way to the prison to see my father for the second time since the incident. I shouldn't see him, however, I know deep down I would regret not seeing him and looking past the situation. Besides he's the only one that can tell me about my mother through a different perspective.

His crimes are so deep they might even sentence him to death.

Kakashi and I are deeply hurt. We even got into a small argument about me coming to see my father.

"you got my message... I thought you'd never show" He looked at me rather relieved and surprised that I came to see him. Sitting his dinner in front of him I kept my distance away from him after that.

"Yes I came, regardless you're still my father although neither Kakashi or I forgive you for what you did because you're still family" I looked up at him smiling slightly. "Besides, I know i'll regret not knowing who my father is when I have the chance and I want to know my mother from someone who was closest to her"

"Sure but first answer my question" I understand why he did what he did, but at the same time there's no excuse to justify actions such as that. He joined to protect me at first led them away from me pretending he didn't know where I was. Then when they offered him to bring my mother back it was too late for him to realize that it won't be the same to have her back with a jutsu.

"That red haired kid that came to rescue you, he's Kazekage...Why would he put himself in danger a second time?" My father must have been curious about that. It almost makes Gaara seem fearless.

"We've been best friends since childhood, I was the first friend he's ever made despite him being a Jinchuriki like me...He was also the first friend I've made outside of the village" I explained to him the first time Kakashi and I went to the Sand Village together.

"Hmm, I thought maybe he was your boyfriend or something"

"Hey!!! Don't just go around assuming things like that!!!" I yelled whacking his head. Why do those that surround me make it hard for me to move on from Gaara. I know he was my first crush and all. I mean we did grow up together. Ugh I still haven't even had my first kiss.

I looked down sadly as my emotions started to rain over me again.

"I did like him, but that's just one of my fairy tales, what would the Kazekage want with me?" I started to play with a strand of my hair trying to forget about what we were talking about.

"Just because he's Kazekage doesn't mean he wouldn't feel the same" He reassured me. "Your mother was beyond popular the most perfect girl here." He stared up at the ceiling smiling slightly. "I wasn't much but the white fangs son but your mother, so kind hearted, so loving... come to find out she had a crush one me" He sighed heavily looking at the wall for a second.

I can tell it hurt him too when you're thinking about the one you love.

"Out of all people I never thought she'd love me but she did" He said smiling widely. "You've grown so well thanks to Kakashi, so I'm sure you can do it... believe in yourself a bit more"

"Thanks for the touching story, however, he's getting married soon, so it doesn't matter how I feel anymore okay... just drop it" I said harshly pulling my knees to my chest.

I just hate the fact that I never told Gaara how I felt. I had so many chances and I stupidly let them slip away from me. Even Temari tried to help me out several times, but blindly I didn't even take those.

Now I'm suffering, the guy I love is living it up with someone else. It obviously was a one sided thing. Being in love with someone that you'd give your heart to hurts the most when your heart is crushed.

Love hurts so bad. I don't understand.

I'M SO STUPID!!!WHY!!!!

"I'll come back in the morning, Dad" I said rushing out of the prison and down the road crying bumping into people.

"Hey Chinami!!" I heard someone shout after me, but I just kept going and going.

After making it home I left the front door open pushing pass Kakashi, running directly into my room locking it behind me. I crouched onto the floor crying silently as I held my pillow letting all the pain and hurt just silently flow out in the form of tears.

"Chinami, please come out and talk to us" I heard Ino say softly as she knocked on the door.

"You know you can tell us anything" Sakura mentioned. I'm surprised she's here, but she probably knows exactly why I'd be upset or I must be making it so obvious anyway.

"Go away there's nothing to talk about" I said kind of harshly hoping they'd just leave me alone.

"If you don't open this door right now I'll punch it all to the ground!!!" I forgot that Sakura is a bit crazy and the last think I can do is upset her like that. At this rate half of Kakashi house would be gone and I with it.

I could hear the other girls try to get her to reconsider that last part though.

Wiping my face dry I then reached for the door unlocking it as the girls came rushing in hugging me tightly.

"Is this about Gaara?" Ino asked.

This could only mean that I have made it so obvious and maybe the whole village knows by now.

"How do you guys know?" I asked them curiously.

"Well your dad mentioned that's why you might be upset, he was released moments after you left" Sakura explained. This is why you can't share your secrets with men/boys.

"I heard that Gaara was getting married, but who is chose is unconfirmed" Hinata spoke. Why is everyone trying to reassure me now. Little does anyone know I've made up my mind to move on, but it just hurts to even think about doing so.

"Temari is here, but Gaara shall arrive tomorrow for the festival, so if he hasn't chosen yet then it's your last chance to win him over" Ino punched the air. They were all trying to encourage me but pushing myself onto Gaara isn't going to make him love if he doesn't.

"I lost my chance I'm just going to move on from him"

"THAT'S QUITTER TALK!!!" Sakura yelled forcing TenTen and Ino to cover her mouth and get her to relax.

Hinata comforted me as I began to cry again. She gently started to rub my back. They weren't wrong.

If I continue to seclude myself away from other including him this situation was only going to worsen itself and I'd never be able to move on from this.

I know it upsets him when I leave for a while and not talk to him. I can't do that any longer. If I can't have him as more than a friend then I don't want to lose him as a friend either.

We stayed up the rest of the night talking about the things I was feeling and why. Of course everyone shared there feelings about someone they had a crush on and I just only learned that TenTen has a crush on bushy brows and Hinata really loves Naruto.

I think Hinata's crush is so cute though because Naruto is a flame that can't be put out even if you dump a bucket of water on it.