she wasn't kind, not by her definition. she was cruel, heartless and rude.. but the two boys only saw a beautiful angel in her. a kind one.
sequel to "annoying"
trigger warnings: mention of death, suicide & violence
that what i thought as i changed into my school uniform. then i broke down there in the washroom. how could i not? seongwu has been my friend... and his blood was on my hands.
ong seongwu, member of the "gang". special solider. the one i have to kill. ish. i have kill the highest solider, but it seems like seongwu wasn't it. since the highest solider high-jacked our security... again.
after wiping my tears, i finished changing my outfit and went outside. i had to avoid jinyoung. he would know i cried. and he'll want to know why.
"haetbit!" i turned and forced a smile as i saw daehwi run up to me. "noona!"
"daehwi, we're the same age," i told him, as we embraced each other. i smelt his strawberry shampoo and...
"jinyoung isn't coming today, come on!" daehwi skipped on and i froze in shock. i knew that smell. i have met the highest solider just once and his hair smelt of strawberry and gunpowder. just like daehwi's.
i shook my head and ran to catch up, bumping into daniel. his hair was a mess and his eyes were puffy. i felt guilt creep up and he smiled and said sorry before moving on.
my father always said i shouldn't feel guilt or give mercy. but that was impossible for me. i always felt guilt. i wished i didn't kill seongwu. i wish i wasn't the one with this assignment. it was staring to get personal.
first seongwu...
then daehwi...
my frist friend...
and crush
and it seemed like both their blood will have to be on my hands.
i ran over to seongwu's grave after school. i knelt in front of it and cried. 'i'm so sorry, seongwu... i... i should've... i should be the one that's dead, i deserve it after all... i killed 3 people, therefore i deserve 3 deaths. not you... i'm so sorry!'
"haetbit," i turned around to see jinyoung walking towards me. his eyes were sort of puffy too, as if he cried.
"jinyoung, why are you here?" i asked, seeing how he was crying before he came here. did he have another reason to come here?
"same reason as you, i suppose," he said, as he sat down on the grass besides me. then, i noticed how he was shaking and held him. we stayed like that with my arms around him.
"jinyoung, you're still shaking," i told him, hugging him tighter. "is something wrong?"
"no," he whispered back. "i'm fine. what about you? you were crying too."
"yeah," i leaned on his back. "but you were the who's keeping it in."
"HAETBIT!" i flinched as my father called me.
"yes, father," i replied as the door to my room slammed open and he came charging in.
father was a bulky man who looked nothing like me. my eyes were hazel brown, his was almost black. my hair was more golden, his more brown. my ears were thin, his was thick. his mouth was bigger and his nose as well.
"HAETBIT! WHERE WERE YOU?" he asked, lifting me up by my collar. "I HEARD YOU FAILED AGAIN, MISERABLE BITCH!"
i braced for what i knew would happen next. he punched me and threw me to the ground. he knelt in front of my bruised body. "fail me again, and i'll make your younger brother the next head of the 'snakes'."
as he was about to leave, i murmured, "as if you were ever planning to make me the head."
as he was about to turn, he must've heard me because he paused for a minuted before leaving. i groaned as i got up to see my brother. he was taller and more muscular, making him a better child. plus, he was a male.
"haetbit, are you okay?" he asked, extending a hand to help me up. i refused, getting up by myself. "reliance is how a warrior dies, because relying on others show weakness."
"i'm perfectly splendid," i spat, forcing myself to walk to my desk. "why wouldn't i be?"
"haetbi-"
"guanlin, go," i said, looking into his eyes. "that's a command."
"yes, noona," he said with obvious disappointment as he left, closing the door softly.
'sorry, guanlin... but i can't spare you any affection... not if i might have to kill you one day just to survive..."
the next day, i saw jinyoung and my face flushed. he seemed to remember what happened too.
"h-haetbit...," i walked up to him and grabbed his hand. his face became red and i wa sure mine was too, but i held on tight.
"j-jinyoung, let's go."
"sure, y-you... you look... sorta," he whispered the last part. "pretty today."
a/n: book 2 is finally out!!!!!
hehehe yep, it was haetbit who shot seongwu
don't hate her though, i tried to portray her in a way that screamed more broken then a monster... she's not a bad person... well, not really...
[edit!]
yah, me gonna change the cover here too... the old one was made by KILLSVILL and i'll upload it here. it's really nice... how do you make it so nice?
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