Blinx: Before the Time Sweeper

Chapter 4: SIMULATION, STIMULATION

"Talking to yourself again, Blinx?"

It's gonna take a while to walk this off, isn't it? If I even walk at all...

"Yes, Mr. Aniki..."

And just like that same soul-bearing stare that I thought was just a custom of those hideous Chronoblobs swept its way over Mr... Aniki himself, and just like the paper below him: it was all empty space and time.

"So, uh... Mr. BLiNX? I presume?"

I never want to see another kid in my life...

"Yeah, Mr... Aniki?"

"Well, results aren't gonna be out for a while, but judging by all this effort you're clearly showing! You're sure a shoe-in for the golden medal of..."

Maybe I really do perform better in my dreams than whatever one of them was laying out before me!

"Participation ribbons! That is if you don't shred this one, like the last time?"

What? I'm a cat, and you were the one that decided that nip-coated ribbons was the only acceptable way of rewarding the tardy, or... well me, actually. Clearly, he didn't share my same enthusiasm though...

"You can join your other classmates in the simulations over in the next room. It's not gonna take long for me to grade this, and maybe even stamp it all the way to the CEO himself, in a nice ceramic envelope!"

Maybe I really should've just bailed this joint...

And just like the hallway of pods and podcasts alike: this vacuum (maybe that's why they give us Sweepers? Like space vacuum? I could've put that down in the test, are you kidding me!?) of a room only offered the bare commodities for a functioning combo of both disorganized racks of lockers; that they couldn't bother even hauling into the newly refurbished locker-room itself (it got that room moreso 'cause the place reeked of Davy Jones locked: yet another moniker of the library I spend so much time sleeping in...) and jarringly lined streaks of Sweeper equipment and pecks that made this kitten chub look like a balloon at Necoji's graduation ceremony.

It didn't any less help the walk itself feel like anything other than a rookie wandering straight into the boss-room at the heart of Time-Square itself... and speaking of Time-Square.

"Since time isn't clearly your priority now, Blinx: how about you take first digs at the simulation here?"

"Difficulty: Extremely Difficult: not recommended for newcomers, or otherwise slackers who think they have better things to do than crash out at an exam" Oh, that's the level of show, don't tell we're at now? Still, maybe a little cardio will wake up these aching joints of fat, fat, seatbelt and dummy cushion itself: in fact that's probably why they chose me in the first place! I was exactly the right-shade of guinea pig for the occasion, and maybe old teach felt the cap wasn't enough company anymore, and he needed a more... striking companion? Nah, that wasn't it – he definitely just wanted to make me look like an idiot in the front of the class, not that I wouldn't have had trouble with that on my own accord.

"Don't you think this is a little, uh... too difficult for me?"

"What? You scared, huh? I thought since you felt yourself better than all of us: that'd you appreciated a good challenge worthy of your skills now and then?"

The seriously passive-aggressive tone of Mr. An... seriously, it's Aniki! Didn't bother to distract me from the smirking and mild laughter of people who clearly knew the difference between large, open room, and booming vocals could provide, but you'd think they'd get the point of "cat-ears" having a lot more range than your usual animal, wouldn't they?

"Sorry, "BLiNX". I just need a little prep for the class, and you were the only one that didn't mind a little light jabbing every-once in a while. Think of this was motivation for the big show we have organized for later, huh?"

At least he knew the meaning...

"Alright, class! We've got reports of seriously shady activity going on around World B1Q64, and the Supervisors thought it dandy that we all raise the stakes a little with the training, and get you more acquainted with the more "urban" side of youth, heh..."

Maybe they really did catch on, or the echoes of comedy before them were really just that hard to avoid...

"BLINX! You're first up to plate! Let's start with Time-Square!

Ah, Time-Square – the hub of both the rich and the poor alike, and the many vacations of Sweepers both elite, and those who figured they were elite: I remember Necoji talking a lot of this place; slanted buildings with luminescent holes at an angle so obtuse that they that looked like they were chewing you out, and revelling in the misery of those stuck on crystal sweeper duty. All of the remains left behind by the all-too confident people there like the trash and benches used as sparingly as they were left chunks when splatted against the walls; and a large overcast sky that seemingly never shifted even under the half-eaten cookie of a Moon that was just floating ominously over the spiralling rapids (at least they took the time to even those out: when they weren't working on that train to the Moon, then they were working on infusing the lampposts themselves with some-kinda detergent or neutralizer that controlled the regularity of the waves themselves... did I seriously just say train to the Moon? Librarian wasn't kidding when she was talking about how reality is a lot more than weirder than fiction – at least that's what I heard when I wasn't black out under the Student section with a good hardcover to soak up all the drool, and keep me from wavering eyes.

"Simulation start!"

Thank you, Mo... I mean, Mother Computer! Wait - are you kidding!? I thought I was paying attention!? Was I really out for that long just thinking about the décor of the place!? Remind me to never trust Necoji or any of his or my calves ever again – at least less than usual: I need them for hurdling myself into that river they've been developing over at the biodome – perfect spot for us freeloaders! I'm pretty sure that's the point anyway, or maybe the CEO just got the results and he started weeping a ravine of his own?

Hopefully they have a couple retries in stoke for the big one I'm about lose to right now...