Your Stories are Bad and You Should Feel Bad

Special: The Problem with Wattpad: Part Two

Howdy ho!

So, last time (Look at the last chapter, dufus) I talked about a few of the issues I have and had with Wattpad. Some agreed, others are idiots. Now, I’m going to rant about the things that can be done to help and fix those very same problems.

This really should be simple enough that I won’t need to explain. Or, at least, I hope your intellect stretches that far.

Let’s start!

The Invisible Readers.

Last time I spoke about the quantity of readers on Wattpad, and how very few of them actually participated in the site’s going-ons. By that, I meant that for all intensive purposes, they are invisible. Just a figment of a number to stare at for a moment.

There is little we can do to encourage others to comment or make themselves visible. After all, choices in the UI (User Interface) aren’t ours to make, and I doubt that they could change much.

Nonetheless, you can help by being the exact opposite.

Have you ever seen a flamewar on Youtube? How did it start?

Simple. One day, some idiot made a comment and stated his or her opinion. Then others disagreed.

No, I’m not encouraging any of you to start flamewars (although, they can be rather fun., so go ahead on any of my works). What I’m trying (and succeeding, because screw failure) to say is that you should comment.

Always comment. State that half-baked opinion of yours. Be as visible as possible! If, for ever hundred invisible readers, there is one that won’t shut up, then the thing commented upon will take life. Activity trumps passivity.

I’d love to point out the subjects I talked about last time and have a solution for each, but I don’t have one for these:

The Gorram Formatting.

There ain’t shit we can do about that. Someone goofed up. Let’s whine about that , then sink into complacent anger while doing our best with this god-awful system.

The Competition.

Again, beyond the normal “start and join contests and milk away your self esteem by comparing yourself to others,” there’s little we can do.

Social Attention.

Yay, third one in a row where I can offer no plausible solution besides the obvious. For the sake of the infirm among you I’ll highlight said obvious: Give in. Yup, abandon your integrity and give in the the popularity drug that Watty is passing around. There’s no other way around it.

This is just depressing, isn’t it? All sorts of problems and nothing you can do to even remotely try to fix them. Big whooping pile of failures is what we are.

So, let’s distill the bullshit and look at what we can do.

First: Don’t ever do as I do.

I’m not here to set an example. So don’t follow that example, please. We need more polite, level-headed and intelligent people. Not only on this site, but everywhere. Act like it. Fake it until you make it.

You want people to see this place as a safe haven? Make it one! Go out there and be nice. Be courteous. Ignore those that don’t reciprocate (really, the best way to kill an asshole’s enthusiasm is to ignore him or her). Be nice to one another! God, that would help sometimes.

Second: Realize that we’re all (mostly) human.

Most of us here are human (shh) and so we will make dumb, stupid, plainly idiotic mistakes that will haunt us forever. Get over it.

If you’re new to writing, this goes double. You have to understand that everything you do will be wrong. Everything. Learning a new art is like learning how to walk all over again. It’s long, tedious, and far more complex than you would think at first. And so, it takes patience, dedication, and a little bit of tough luck to push through and actually start to master the ability to write.

Take it from face value that, until you’ve spent a minimum of ten-plus years studying, you’re going to make a lot of little errors and a fair amount a big ones.

Seeing that you’re going to be making those mistakes, perhaps some leniency towards others would be welcome, eh?

Three: Improve.

This is perhaps one of the greatest things you can do to improve this site: improve yourself first. If the quality of your writing grows, and that of your neighbours does as well, then, perhaps, through a group effort, we might be able to make the site’s general writing better.

As long as quality keeps rising faster than horny 14-year olds post their fanfiction, we might eventually still the tide of crap. Maybe.

Four: Help.

I know this might sound counter-intuitive to those unintroduced to the concept, but teaching and helping others master a skillset is usually the best way to learn how to employ that skill yourself.

You’ll find dozens of help threads that need more helpers (PM me if you’re looking, I run a few and we could use the help. Plus, you don’t need to be polite in my threads), people that need honest critiques, and yet more writers that just want to hear an opinion.

Helping helps, obviously.

Well, I feel like I was awfully kind today, I’d better be reaping up the karma. And I didn’t even drop a single mention about how morbidly obese your mother is! I’m a saint.

Keep warm, stay cool!