I'm Gonna Show You.

Visitation

One Week Later.....

The previous week was dragging me down rather harshly, and I couldn't bare getting out of bed. I've tried several attempts to forget the incident but it's nearly impossible. I should be getting out, making friends and enjoying life.

Unfortunately, this won't be the case. Jey Jey was still in recovery and so was I— recovery from the news that is. Today is visitation and I know if I don't go Caleb just might hate me, and I absolutely CAN NOT tell him what's going on.

The guilt and pressure of not telling him will weigh me down Into the depths of my despair. I'm so emotionally drained and tired of feeling scared, empty and sad. Most of the time I can't sleep but all I want to do is lay in bed. I mentally prepare myself to get ready and get the hell out of Caleb's house so I can face him for the first time in what feels like forever.

My feet hit the cold, hard wooden floor and I slowly make my way to the bathroom to shower. I gathered my towel and the clothes I'd be putting on afterwards, then hopped into the warm water. It hit my face quickly and all at once waking me up a bit more.

I pull my now wet hair back, looking down toward the floor where the water was hitting, now the water that was sliding down my body to my legs was blood. The drain stopped and all the blood was filling the tub quickly, starting to overflow and pour out onto the floor. I jerk back causing me to fall to the ground screaming and crying.

"NOOO!"

"STOOOP! PLEASE JUST STOP!"

Closing my eyes, rocking back and forth and then opening them again it was all gone. Nothing but water was coming out of the shower head and down the drain. Tears bursts from eyes and pour down my face, what is wrong with me?

•

Driving the long drive alone to Caleb's facility was pretty uncomfortable and boring. I didn't realize how lonely I really was until Caleb left. I just wanted nothing more than to tell him what was going on so he could hold me and tell me it wasn't my fault, but it was. All of this was my fault and I don't care who says it isn't.

~~~Time Skip~~~

I finally pull up to Caleb's facility and park. The thought of lying to Caleb and pretending like everything was fine made me itch with nervousness 10 times worse than before. I didn't move a muscle though, everything was so quiet I could hear my own hear beat rapidly. 'Just get out and do it' I thought. I'm stepping out of the car when I notice my phone is ringing, I look at it and see that it's Jey Jey. 

"Hello?" I answer.

"Hola! I just wanted to let you know I'm getting much better and I can have visitors now, if you want to come up here."  He says, voice rather raspy.

"Oh. Uhm, I'm just about to go inside to visit Caleb. Maybe some other time."

"Oh, yeah. I'm sorry I guess I completely forgot about Caleb." I could practically hear his frown. I just don't feel that way about him which must hurt on his part but I can't help who I love. I feel like the day he got brutally hurt by Kurtis he was going to try and kiss me, which is a little awkward. If Caleb hasn't changed, I won't be able to continue being friends with Jey Jey once he's out.  "Well, visitation is about to start so I'll talk to you later." I said my goodbye then hung up so I could finally enter the ginormous building.

"Hi. I'm here for visitation." I say to the lady at the front desk. 

"May I see some form of ID?" She asks, to which I nod and hand it to her. "Okay. Who is the patient and what is your relation?"