❝What if I'm not the
superhero? What if I'm
the bad guy?❞
━━━ in which nora elliot
desperately tries to fix
herself, but falls in love
with someone who, in
the process...
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DEAR APRIL!
𝐍𝐎𝐑𝐀 𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐌 𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐈𝐍. It wasn't like she missed then one minute and not the other, she missed them constantly, but today more than others. That dull ache she usually felt every day was magnified. It felt like someone was punching her in the chest, repeatedly. It felt like someone had ripped her heart out and stomped on it. Everything ached. She hadn't gotten out of bed yet or gotten dressed. Going as far as the bathroom and back into her bed. So, here she was, in her pajamas still and cuddling her little sister's teddy bear, and if she held it tight enough, closing her eyes, it smelled and felt like she was still there.
It was raining, again. Just like every other day in Forks, Washington. She didn't have to look at the forecast anymore, she already knew what it was going to be the minute she woke up. It seemed that she wasn't the only one who was crying, but the world was, too. Her father had left early for work, leaving a kiss on her head and note on her bedside. She knew this because she'd been awake the whole night, thinking and crying, not getting a wink of sleep.
Nora never knew you could miss someone this much. She never knew you could miss someone so much that it was tearing you apart on the insides, leaving you with agonizing pain. She never knew you could miss someone so much, that even the littlest of things could remind you of them. She never knew you could miss someone so much, that you'd become cold and bitter to feeling anything but utter, agonizing, crumbling grief. That the moment someone brought them up, you could feel yourself falling apart and become angry at the person for bringing them up.
It was a Sunday. There wasn't anything special about this Sunday, nothing that was important enough to remember the date. It was just one of those days, and they seemed to be happening more often, too. Nora could feel the tears building up again as she breathed in the familiar scent of her little sister that was imprinted in the bear. She was too afraid that smell was going to leave soon, just like they did...
Breathing in the scent one last time, Nora set the bear aside and slowly got up. She knew she had to, she couldn't lay in bed all day. Not again. She told herself she'd get past this, even if it hurt worse to do so. She didn't understand how her father got up every day and went to work, never bringing up her mother or her sister. She knew he was bottling it, she didn't need anyone to tell her that... but it wasn't fair. It wasn't fair that he got to push on and every time she thought she was moving on, she was getting shoved back ten steps. It was a never-ending process.
