Conversations I wish I had been part of.

6

Tell me about for first couple of romantic relationships.

I was 11. My first boyfriend was a guy named Ryan. He was a normal kid, I guess. I feel bad because of how I got with him. My best friend, at the time, asked me to ask him if he liked her. So i did and he said he liked me not her. I was attention starved as a kid, so I didn't really think twice before agreeing to be boyfriend/girlfriend (because at the time I identified as female). It was a shitty thing as a friend to do, and I know that now, no matter how attention-starved I was.

Well that lasted a little over a month before some other guy started to take interest in me. This guy was 19 about to turn 20, and I should have thought that this wasn't right, and I should stay away. I didn't think that at all, I just liked the attention, even if it was forbidden attention. Then 3 days later, after he had kissed me in the hallway leading to the gym locker rooms .The guidance counselor called mom and told her I was "close friends" with this kid. I denied it and told her I turned down his advancements.  Then the next day I ignored him and basically broke up with him? After that we didn't speak.

My next relationship was Molly. I was 13 or 14 then. She was the first true love of my life. To this day I miss what we had. I rushed things and should have kept the best thing I've ever known. But it was my fault we broke up, so I guess I never deserved her anyway.

Then came Jace. He fucked me up all kinds of ways. I never want to go back to the place of puppy love he had me at.  But that's another story for another day.