Double Agent |Kylo Ren|

11 - The Game Continues

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.

I focus on my breaths, intake, exhalation, all of it. I need to focus on something other than the already intense situation in the forefront of my mind. I now have another factor to consider in this First Order mess.

I don't want to say I've bitten off more than I can chew just yet, but slowly it seems like that may be the end result here, especially if things collapse.

I reach out through the Force with closed eyes, feeling the magnitude of life at this base. I sense all troopers, Cayden, and Ben. Ben's presence I can feel the most because of its conflicted nature...and the fact that it's getting closer to me. Meaning I am most likely expecting company very soon.

I wipe my search from my mind, concentrating once again on my breathing. The cot I sit cross-legged on shifts when I move a fraction to adjust.

Instead of knocking on my door like a normal person, he opens it.

"You've lost your manners, Ren," I say, opening one eye.

Ben actually flinches at the use of the name. "I figured you wouldn't have minded me dropping in."

"What, no duties to uphold?"

"Nothing pressing, no. How did it go with the prisoner?"

With a wave of my hand, I Force close my quarters door, allowing Ben and I some privacy. "He's my roommate. Ever since the Academy fell...I had to start over. He helped me with that. He's my best friend, as stupid as he can be sometimes."

"Why is he here?"

"He thought I couldn't do this." I slack my posture, hunching a bit. "Honestly, I don't know if I can. I want to trust your words, Ben, I really do, but..." I exhale loudly. "I don't want to believe this is manipulation on your part. I want to believe we're building something genuine between us. That I'm helping you become who you once were. I don't want this to be a sham."

"It's not," he tells me softly. "It isn't easy, grappling with two opposing sides inside of me. Both speak to me. Both fight for me and against me." He leans against the wall nearest the door. "Sometimes they both shout really loud."

"Nobody's a winner yet, huh?"

"Unfortunately not. I'm hoping you may help decide that."

"Yeah, well, it's about to get a lot trickier. We may be able to hide this from Hux and the others on this base, but the Supreme Leader...he's the one I worry most about."

"You got past him when I brought you to him the first time."

"I still think that's fool's luck," I blurt before I can stop myself. "Maybe he let me stay on purpose. Maybe he's using you as a tool to get me to truly convert and go dark." My arms rest on my legs. "I just need to know what's real and what isn't."

Ben walks to my cot and kneels before me. His eyes look the softest I've seen them since...since back before the Academy destruction. "Search."

I tilt my head, not understanding the simple word at first. Understanding my confusion, he takes one of my hands and places it against the side of his head. At this, my mind gets it, and my eyes widen. I retract my hand. "Ben, no."

"You want the truth, Amara. Search through my mind's eye. I have nothing to hide from you. You won't hurt me. Things are different now than they were the first time you did this."