16th October 2014
Unknown number: Morning, beautiful.
Anah: Good morning.
Unknown number: Did you tell your folks about me?
Anah: Umm… not exactly. I was half way through telling them about you when Eden started talking about having a party at our place Saturday night. Suddenly, the fact that there’s a guy in my life paled in comparison.
Unknown number: There’s a party at your place Saturday night?
Anah: That’s what you got from the message? Not the fact that I didn’t get a chance to tell my parents about you?
Unknown number: I’m kinda glad you didn’t tell them about me. And yeah, the party was more important. Where was my invite?
Anah: Why are you glad? And I was gonna ask you, but I didn’t think you’d want to come.
Unknown number: Of course I would.
Anah: ‘Would’ what?
Unknown number: Come to your birthday party.
Anah: Look, I can only deal with one thing at a time, so choose- talk about me not telling Mom and Dad about you, or talk about this party. What’s it to be?
Unknown number: Party.
Anah: Typical guy, huh? Well, obviously you’re invited. Eden’s telling everyone to get here by nine. Do you know where I live?
Unknown number: Sure I do.
Anah: Oh, yeah. I forget that you’re my own personal stalker.
Unknown number: I’ll be there. So about your parents. I’m glad you didn’t tell them about me, because you wouldn’t have been telling them about me. You’d be telling them about Jacob, a boy who doesn’t exist.
Unknown number: Why are you in Eden’s Poli Sci class?
Anah: I’m getting whiplash from all the conversation changes. Give me a second to get my head together.
Anah: One- glad you’ll be there. Maybe you can come talk to me? Two- I wasn’t going to go down that ‘Jacob’ route. Haley’s plans are always sound on paper, but in reality, her ideas suck. And three- I’m not in Eden’s Poli Sci class.
Unknown number: Yeah you are. I can see you. You’re dressed like her and you’ve got your hair tucked up into a messy knot so the teacher won’t suspect anything, but Eden doesn't gnaw at her bottom lip like you do, Anah. Big giveaway.
Anah: Whoa. You really are a creep, aren’t you?
Anah: Eden has a test next period and hasn’t crammed for it.
Unknown number: So?
Anah: So, I’m going to ace the test for her.
Unknown number: Huh?
Anah: I’ve got to pretend to be my twin.
Unknown number: I don’t like this. And didn’t Eden have a shorter skirt in her wardrobe for you to wear?
Anah: I'm sensing sarcasm.
Unknown number: A little. I mean, I'm appreciating your legs, but so is every other guy in the damned school. I’m pretty sure I saw a freshman actually drool over you this morning.
Anah: He was drooling over Eden. It happens all the time. They mistake me for her and then they’re disappointed when they find out it’s me, not Eden.
Anah: Except you… you actually like that I’m me.
Unknown number: Your sister is pretty, but you’ve got her beat.
Unknown number: You shouldn’t blush like that, babe. It’s not a very Eden thing to do.
Anah: Sure thing, Honey Bun.
Unknown number: Why do I even text you when you abuse me like this?
Anah: Oh, I love you too, Honey Bun.
Unknown number: What-
Anah: I mean-
Unknown number: You love m-
Anah: That wasn’t how it soun-
Unknown number: Your face! I can’t even breathe! I think I might actually die from laughter.
Anah: If I could slap you right now, I would!
Unknown number: Chill, babe. It’s cool. I know what you meant. I just hope that one day… maybe you could say it for real.
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Short StoryWhen Anah Miller, agony aunt to the whole of Hastings Academy, replies to Clueless and Useless' e-mail about his unrequited love, little does she know that's she's opened Pandora's Box. A few days later, when she receives a text from an unknown numb...
