Desiderium

Fēoƿertīne

It was a seedy part of the city where he eventually found himself. The streets were slick with an unknown substance– or perhaps substances–and littered with the torn pages of newspapers. Networks of narrow alleyways ran between each cramped building, each one darker than the street it fed into. To top it off,, there was also a rancid odor hanging in the air, smelling of sewage and smoke.

The twisted sights and putrid smell reminded Benjamin of home, his original home. And for this, he felt oddly comforted.

His nostalgia did not last long and it gave way to curiosity as he saw Emilia cross the street. She veered towards a three-story building where Nathaniel stood outside, presumably waiting for her. He broke into a smile, enveloping her in his arms before giving her a kiss on the forehead.

Benjamin's eyes burned with malice at the sight, knowing his suspicions were confirmed yet again.

So why did he not leave? Why was his body compelled to follow in after them?

"Here." He tossed the hotel clerk a couple of wadded bills, not waiting around to watch him count it.

He continued further into the dark building that smelled of mildew and dust, climbing wooden stairs that threatened to splinter beneath him.

"So it's not fatal?" He heard Nathaniel ask ahead of him.

"No." Emilia gave a short cough. "Just all this smog in the air setting it off."

Benjamin reached the last step and poked his head around the corner. Nathaniel struggled with the knob for a few seconds, fumbling with the key. Emilia stood behind him, watching as he finally unlocked the door and stepped inside, pulling her in with him.

If someone had told Benjamin he would one day be peeking into a keyhole of an occupied room, he would have scoffed at them for thinking so grossly of him.

But now, that was the exact situation he was in.

As he watched the couple embrace passionately, the taste of bile rose to his tongue, burning it. His teeth clenched together so tightly they threatened to crack. Even his vision went blurry for a moment. His brain pounded into his skull and he thought he might actually pass out from the pain. All the while, his heart was a muddle of disappointment and disgust.

He knew he shouldn't feel this way. This had happened the previous two times. But bearing witness to it proved to be too much.

Even for a doctor such as himself.

No longer able to stomach the sight of or sounds from the pair, Benjamin had to turn away. Steadying himself against the peeling wallpaper, he took a moment to regain his composure.

Any other man...

If it would have been any other man, he wouldn't have cared. He would not need to worry about her because there would be no reason to. But Emilia was drawn to Nathaniel like a moth to a flame. And like the moth, she ended up in ashes every time.

There was no point in staying. In watching, listening, torturing himself over the inevitable. Instead, he headed to the local pub, staggering as though he were already drunk. Oh, how he wished he were.

He was not sure how long he had been walking, but Benjamin knew he should have already come across a tavern. The streets had grown more empty, more silent. This was not the way.

He turned to retrace his steps when something caught his eye. A gleam in the glass, like that of a siren's call. There, in this dark lane in a rundown curio shop was a work of art.

Could it be?

Benjamin approached the window slowly. His head turned to the side as he studied the pale white masterpiece. Empty eye sockets studied him back. A finely stitched leather beak smiled in welcome and Benjamin found himself reaching out, tracing the shape with a sense of longing.

Hello, old friend.

As he stared back into the window, his reflection seemed to merge with the antiquated leather, forming both mask and mask-wearer into one.

He had never seen a more beautiful sight.