A Cursed Day

01. A Cursed Day

I realised what a fucked up day it was after 4 years and I went from having a boyfriend and no dead relatives to having nearly no one. The next year my dad was diagnosed with cancer, he is still struggling.

I mean what kind of person has this much hate being thrown at them? I thought I was a nice person and never did anything to harm anyone on purpose, but it seems like the world doesn't like me at all, in fact, it hates me so much that here I am on my 28th birthday and have no one to spend it with.

In case you were wondering, this year it has already happened. My dad is right now in surgery as he relapsed this morning, falling into a coma and I'm not sure he is going to wake up from this one.

Luckily my mum is the only one left who has perfect health, even I was diagnosed with diabetes last year.

I mean it's not the end of the world but people really underestimate the illness and what it can do, I am doing ok at the moment but I know the older I get that the more damage it is going to do.

I was supposed to be here to forget everything but it seems like the alcohol is making all these memories even more vivid, as if I needed the help with my overactive imagination.

"One more." I order and in less than a minute there is another shot in front of me, inviting me to welcome the burn of the alcohol and the consequences that follow.

I down that shot and squint my eyes as the uncomfortable burn travels through me, all my memories flashing before my eyes as if my head was a computer and my life is a sad depressing PowerPoint.

The way he kissed her with a smile on his face, his arms around her waist. Them walking together in sync as if nothing else in the world matters but their moments together.

Waking up to the call from my mum as she cries down the phone, telling me that there were some complications with my granddads surgery.

Holding my great- grandmothers frail hand in my own as she takes her last breath and her eyes close as she finally gets to rest.

Me visiting my parents house as they're on holiday, looking forward to seeing my dog Elza. Only to find her in my old bed still and unmoving.

Watching my dad come out to the hospital room with rare tears in his eyes as my mother holds onto him for dear life, the diagnosis clear in his eyes.

Waking up in a hospital room with my parents teary eyes staring at me, moving their lips but nothing is coming out. Being frozen and not being able to lift my hands and wipe away their tears, stuck to that bed for the next 3 months after the crash not able to feel anything but the emotional pain and suffering that time brings.

I am broken out of my pity party as the glasses from in front of me are taken away and a tall glass of water with a white pill next to it is placed at the same place.

"I think maybe you should slow down on the drinks sweetheart." Says the blurry face in front of me and I open my mouth to talk back but my words just won't come together.

"Drink the aspirin and you won't feel as shit in the morning." He advises again and maybe it was my drunk brain or maybe it was the way he seemed to have a white aura around him, but I find myself swallowing the pill and then drink half the glass of water.

"Why do you care if I feel shit in the morning?" I manage to ask through my tied tongue.

"I don't like seeing beautiful women like you, all alone here in a bar getting drunk. I don't see anyone here that is going to pick you up and make sure you get home safely." He gives me a worried smile which is weird for me since I have been taking care of myself for so long now that even my parents don't help me or meddle in my life, they have their own problems to deal with.