The World According to Jessie

Epilogue

"...This is so weird! I cannot believe that I am actually writing a forward to my first book! Ok, so I cheated a little and this is just like one big diary that I started to keep, but you have to admit that it's been crazy. I thought only Carrie Bradshaw got away with writing columns and diaries as her first book, but apparently it can happen in real life too. And life has, in the immortal words of Ronan Keating, a rollercoaster. Especially that month last summer. Considering I started this book back then, no one could ever let me forget that summer now could they?

I suppose in a way, that summer was the making of me. When my boss told me to "go home" effectively, I didn't think that that much could happen in four short weeks but it so did. That summer was the beginning of a completely new me. It forced me to get out of the world that existed in my head and into the real world and what I was missing around me. I never realised actually how selfish I was being. Not selfish in a bad way but maybe an unhealthy way. My imagination had always been very active but I never thought that I could actually let it spill into the real world. So yeah, going home was a wakeup call. It also brought me a new sense of confidence which, I had lost over the years.

Of course, with the bad things came the good things and thankfully they beat the bad things into submission. And I am happy to say that they are still winning the battle. In fact, they are still running around right now in their little superhero capes and fending away the bad things that are threatening to surface. Sorry, you have you indulge me sometimes with metaphors (insert smiley face). So, I suppose you all want to know what was happening with my gorgeous family. Well, happy to report that good things are happening there too,

My gorgeous Grandparents celebrated fifty years of marriage with a huge party in the infamous Tower Ballroom. I am proud to say that the last time I danced with Granddad Mel was not actually the last time ever and he will protest that I am getting quite good at it. I am even taking lessons part time for a very special occasion coming up. The Foxtrot is my best dance by far closely followed by the Waltz. I am still deciding which one to perfect. My teacher says I am a model pupil and apparently, this makes Granddad Mel more proud than actually getting a publishing deal!

Mum and Dad are still together. They haven't thought about remarriage or anything like that. They told me that they don't want to spoil anything between them. I can understand why, their marriage didn't work but their relationship does. I am not going to question, it's just good to have my parents back together where they belong. I am also proud to report that it's been almost eight months since Mum's hormones wanted to make her murder Dad. This has been a breakthrough.

Talking of breakthroughs, Aunt Lillian is doing so much better. She hasn't touched alcohol for nearly a year and is still attending the meetings regularly. Our relationship is getting better especially since I moved back up here full time. She's out of rehab and back at the Towers and slowly rebuilding her relationship with my Grandparents. She says that she didn't really blame me for her addiction; I was just the one in the firing line. I already knew this, but it was nice to hear it from her mouth.

I don't live at the Towers anymore. Since the publishing advance came through, I thought it was high time that the old bedroom was finally put to rest and I got myself somewhere grown up to live. The Take That poster has finally gone to its well-deserved grave and I found this place and held onto the door frame when the Estate Agent said that it was time to go. I loved it that much that I signed the lease there and then. And yes, I DID read the agreement. I had someone come along for back up just in case (insert second smiley face – editor's note can we do these Melissa?).

So yes, I am writing this from the gorgeous balcony of my sea view flat on the North Shore (the quiet bit) whilst sipping a very strong coffee. Hey, there's one thing that will never change is my coffee addiction. I did try the de-caff stuff but it just sent me dolly tap so I went back to the regular stuff. I kind of figured that London really wasn't for me and I certainly didn't miss it. I mean, yes I have had to go back, but it's not home. My head was there but my heart wasn't. Like I said, I'm a Northerner not a Londoner. Always will be. My heart has got Blackpool stamped through it like a stick of rock.

Talking of heart, this brings me to Tristan. I haven't seen hide or hair of him since I left him stranded in the middle of Piccadilly. I didn't belong with him, I never did. He didn't want a girlfriend, he just wanted fun, someone to pick up his washing, cook his food etc. treat him like the pretend rock start that he thought he was and I wanted something more. This was what I found. I found my home again and found the place that I actually belonged. The column as you know, is now long gone but will live on in this book. My first fiction novel is near completion to so look out for that. Finally, something that I can let my imagination run wild and not let it affect my personal life.

So, in my closing statement I want to say thank you to everyone who made my dreams come true, even if they had to do it by dragging me kicking and screaming out of my world. It wasn't easy, but you did it. And I found what I supposed I had been searching for the whole time. Love, companionship, you know what Carrie found with Big, I've got that now and it's pretty darn good.

My family and my love mean the world to me and as crazy as they are, I would change them for the world.

I love you all and I wouldn't be without you. I could kill you sometimes, but certainly wouldn't be without you.

Jessie xxx <3 ..."

'God, I am a soppy cow.' I said, resisting the urge to delete everything and start over. When the two M's said they would like an introduction for the book, I don't think they meant "pour your heat all over the page like you've had a few in The Sands". I picked up my mug to take another long sip of my coffee and realised that I had drained it dry.

'Bugger...' I said to myself, holding the cup aloft and readjusting my sunglasses with my free hand. 'Refill please!' I yelled, waving it back and forth. I could hear footsteps and a deep sigh coming from behind me along with a waft of Davidoff aftershave.

'I didn't realise that slave was also in my job description.' The sigh said, pouring coffee into my cup.

'That along with personal assistant, dresser, credit card keeper, dish dryer and eye candy.' I smiled, as a set of green eyes met mine.

'What did I Simon Farmer, do to deserve you Jessie Clarins?' Simon smiled, as he brushed his hand through my hair. I rang my finger down his face and Eskimo kissed his nose.

'You must have been a very good boy when you were younger.' I giggled, watching him get up.

'Either that or I really impressed Santa with our shenanigans behind the bike sheds.' He giggled placing a gorgeous kiss on my forehead. 'Hey don't be too late writing that; your mother will kill us if we aren't on time. And the hormones are set to burst again apparently.'

'Really?' I asked, turning around slightly as Simon walked back inside.

'Yep.' He called from the kitchen. 'Your Dad sent a SOS text this morning.' I groaned and rolled my eyes. I cracked my knuckles before adding a little extra to the page...

"...p.s. Scratch that about Mum. Dad sent S.O.S. this morning according to Him Indoors. Seems that the hormones are about to blow again! Honestly, your late once for something and she goes mad!"

'Better.' I said, as I pressed save and went back to the title page. I still didn't have a name for my masterpiece of cut and paste and the publisher was hot on my backside for one. I stretched out my arms, and took a quick glance at my left hand and the piece of jewellery that caught the light. I smiled and giggled to myself feeling that wave of love once again. I didn't think Mum would throw so much energy into finding me a wedding venue because Dad had wanted me to put wedding plans on hold forever, for fear of actually losing his little girl. Something, which would never happen of course. I glanced back into the kitchen where Simon was busy putting away pots and pans whilst quietly whistling tunelessly to himself. All was perfect in my world. The world that I had created.... I raised my eyebrows and flashed a grin as I typed the words on the title page...

THE WORLD ACCORDING TO JESSIE-by-JESSIE CLARINS

There, perfect!

THE END