Needy

Chapter 1 - Confidence is Key

As I sat on the bathroom floor of Lucy Parker's house, my face turning towards to toilet bowl every few seconds, I realised I had a good life.

While Lucy and Georgia held my hair and rubbed my back I thought about the night I had had. I drank more vodka in one night than I did in my entire life. Tom Green called me hot after we made out in Lucy's little sister's room. I looked great...at the start of the night. Life was great.

The fact that I thought of this whole situation as a great one is probably a shock. It's a shitty thing to admit, but I was really liking the attention. Not that I've been starved off all consideration my entire life, but I was beginning to be fully aware of my popularity at the beginning senior year.

My friends are the reason for that. I was just simply lucky freshman year. Growing up, I had friends and I wasn't a complete freak, but I was neglected by the majority of my class. Not that it bothered me at all, I was content with having my small circle of friends being the sole people that greeted me in school. It was on my first day of high school when I randomly sat next to the beautiful Lucy Parker that kickstarted my social life for the next couple of years.

She was high-spirited and smiley, and I was just extremely outgoing and desperate to make new friends. We had such similar interests it actually shocked me. None of my friends from elementary had the same hobbies or likes as me, it was refreshing. We spent all that first day together, with her introducing me to her friend from childhood, Georgia. Soon enough, we were a tight-knit group.

I didn't intend to be well-known around school. In fact, at the beginning, it terrified me. I was getting types of attention I'd never received before in my entire life, attention that made me so concerned with how I looked and what I said.

Boys, for the first time in my existence, would actually speak to me in a flirtatious way, however, I'm of the opinion that they were more interested in who I am, not what I am. The girls, all equally beautiful, were more desired by the boys though. It didn't bother me much, seeing as I wasn't the type of person to swing man to man or, should I say, dick to dick. I tend to focus on one for a period of time.

It's a reason for guilt but I enjoy knowing people envy what I do and who I hang out with. My friend group, collectively made up of Lucy, Georgia and I, thrived on the knowledge that people wanted to hang out with us.

I felt disgusted with myself sometimes, knowing how infatuated I was with the idea of popularity. However, it's hard to deny yourself that huge boost of confidence you frequently get being so sought-after. It's like an addiction, to be frank.

After gargling some mouthwash and fixing my lipstick, I stumbled back into the party with whatever amount of grace I had left. No one cared, though. The social lubricant of alcohol had made everyone oblivious to any situation other than theirs.

Monday morning had arrived and, soon enough, I was strolling towards my friends, passing a bunch of ill-looking teenagers still hungover from the weekend.

The girls were hard to miss. The chatter could be heard from miles away. In addition, the girls were stunning, between Lucy's striking blue eyes and Georgia's baby-faced complexion, the two of them looked like a line up for a modelling agency.

As I approached the bench, I noticed a curly haired girl sitting next to them. The closer I got, I realised it was Jada, a girl who would be quite friendly with us. I wondered for a moment why she was sitting next to the girls in the morning. They were most likely just discussing the weekend.

"Hey ladies" I said, joining them on the wooden bench.

"Hi Mia" they chirped back. A moment of silence followed.