perfectly imperfect <<<< Austin Post Story

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I woke up and realized Rain wasn't on my couch. I wondered if she already was getting ready but that's weird and unlike her to get up before me. I looked at my phone and saw the clock. 2:00pm. I started freaking out. I ran into my room and saw Rain and Austin. "Good morning sunshine." Austin said and smiled. "Too much cookie dough and La La Land?" Rain laughed and came up to hug me. "What-why-your-it's" I couldn't make out what I was trying to say. "Austin got here at like 1:50 and his knock woke me up. I tried waking you up but you were out like a rock." I looked from Rain to Austin. "oh" I said. Rain still was hugging me and walked me over to the bed. "What have y'all talked about" Something about my boyfriend and best friend being the only two awake made me very unsettled. "Mostly you" Austin smiled and pulled me onto his lap. "Yeah I told him all your embarrassing stories and told him what you like." I smiled. "What do I like?" I asked. What did she tell him he didn't already know. "you prefer dunkin over starbucks,your favorite color is red,you love tulips,and one time in fifth grade you fell down the stairs when your crush said hi to you." Austin finished looking prouder then ever. "Oh" Austin looked down at the bed like he knew something was wrong. Rain definitely knew because she was giving me the I know something is wrong look. Rain rubbed my legs that were off Austin because my lap was taking up the room. "Tay what's wrong" I looked at her and wanted to cry. This is so crazy I thought. No way did anything happen. "I think I need to take a shower" I stood up and walked away with out saying anything to them. I peaked my head around the bathroom door and saw them looking confused and worried. "Y'all can go to mini golf with out me and lunch I feel sick from all that cookie dough" I gave my weakest smile and shut the door. I started the bath water and soon before it was even half way Austin walked in. "Babe what's wrong" He grabbed my arm. I looked in his eyes and lost it. Why couldn't I trust him. I removed his hand from me and started throwing in bath salts. I grabbed a bottle poured then grabbed anything I could think of to be put in my bath. My sleep syrup from bath and body works. I started frantically throwing things in my bathtub and moving at a face pace. Austin grabbed me by the waist. "Hey hey breath babe calm down baby what's wrong" He held me close to him. I kept looking around trying to find the perfect thing to take my mind off of him off of Skylar and off of Max. I looked in his eyes and started crying. A bad cry. A cry i've only done in front of one person. Skylar. Austin pulled my body to now be touching him. He played with my hair with his hands and whispered. "Hey baby it's okay it's okay i'm right here." He held me and didn't ask any questions. I finally moved my body from him and turned the water off. I looked in the mirror and rolled my eyes. My eyes were dark red and a puffy level i've never seen. Austin grabbed my hand. "You look beautiful" I went out to lay in my bed and I didn't see Rain. There was however a empty wrapper of cookie dough. Take good care of my girl I think y'all need to talk and I love you Tay bear text me later. I read the note and wanted to cry. "Tay bear" I laughed. Austin smiled. "Can we talk about it?" Austin asked his smile fading. "I don't think you want to know" Austin looked like I just took away his happiness he had left. "You don't think i'll care?" He looked down and started playing with his hands. I knew he was upset. "No no no I think you will care too much Austin." He stood up this time. "Tell me. Please" he whispered. He acted like I cheated on him. Which with his past relationship I could see why that thought would scare him. "I've never told anyone this." I whispered lightly. Like Rain was going to be in the other room. "Oh not even Rain?" He looked confused. I shook my head and lowered it like I was embarrassed. "It's okay babe" I looked at him and tried to study his face. He looked scared. "I umm I lied" He kept his hand on mine but he let go a little. "About-about what" He asked getting further away. "I have had a boyfriend in the past. One i've never told Rain about." I started to get teary eyed. He rubbed my arm. "Why didn't you tell her?" "We became best friends during the time of her horrible break up. I never found time to tell her about mine. Plus helping her and being with her made me feel better." Austin gave me an understanding smile. "Tay what happened with him" I looked down and couldn't look in his eyes for this question. "He cheated on me with my beat friend. We were as close as me and Ray. I walked in to his apartment and they were on the couch. I never thought I would be okay and I thought that I could never be loved." Austin held me to his chest as my eyes started to water. He kissed my head. "I stayed with him" I whispered embarrassed. "Baby why" he said quite. "I-I don't know. I couldn't give up on him. Then after I stayed he did it more. Not with Skylar but other people. He started drinking and we got in fights." Austin kept holding me and playing with my hair. I looked near his eyes and he was about to cry. "I left him and moved out here." Austin smiled at that. A weak smile. "Baby it's okay. you don't need to be ashamed. What happened happened love and you can't change it. You have trust issues and that's okay. I'll never cheat on you baby" I smiled. Did I trust him? No. But I knew he would be the one to make me better. He hugged me and kissed me soft. "You need to tell Rain" I kissed him more. "I know" He smiled and we lay down. "I'll go to her house tomorrow" I said and cuddled up next to him. "You can go over there for dinner" I looked at him and kissed him. "I love you so much" he lay his head on my neck. "I love you most"