Aquarelle [h.s]

ten

So, I decided to just let it go. "It's fine, just don't do it ever again" I said with a sigh. "Honestly, if you can't help yourself, just don't come to the studio while he's there again. I'd really prefer not to have to call my model to say I'm sorry for what you said, you know." I sat down next to him, crossing my legs on the couch. I wasn't even sure I wanted to have dinner anymore.

"I'm not sorry about what I said" he commented, and I sighed again at his stubbornness.

"You should be, because it really wasn't nice and you shouldn't have said it without knowing the full story" I told him, trying to get the message across. I understood what he was trying to do, but that just wasn't the right way, and I had no intention of having him think so negatively about my model for months. That would've just created an extremely weird environment, one that I was sure I had no intention of working in.

"Then tell me the full story" he said, turning his head to look at me.

I shook my head. "Not now" I told him, picking up the remote control and turning on the television again. "Let's just watch the TV now."

He sent me another glance, but thankfully decided to go along with my attempt to change topic, and didn't bring it up for the rest of the night.

•   •   •

The first half of the morning on Wednesday was spent in the most complete silence, and I couldn't tell if it was because Harry was still uneasy because of what Nicholas had said, or because I was still embarrassed about it and he could see it too. I'd thought that the silence that had surrounded us the first times was embarrassing, but that one was definitely way more awkward, mainly because it was quite clear that none of us truly wanted it to be there.

By the time the midday pause arrived, I couldn't have been happier. I put my things in order quickly and put on my coat, and I was quick to remove myself from the extremely embarrassing situation we'd ended up in because of Nicholas. It was weird to think that the little friendliness between us had been so fragile, that just a couple of sentences had been able to shatter it to pieces. I really didn't want to worry about it, but the truth was, I was a bit sad about it. I would've liked things to be a bit smoother between Harry and I.

I exited the building quickly and sat down on the bench on the opposite side of the street, staring right ahead and finally allowing myself to take a deep breath.

Stuck in that room with Harry, I'd felt like I was suffocating, pieces of the conversation I'd had with Nicholas the day before coming back to me.

I know he was right, kind of. I shouldn't have been joking around and laughing with Harry, considering our past and our attempt at developing a professional relationship, that could've been put in a critical position if something were to happen between us. But on the other side, I knew that nothing would've, because I had no intention of throwing myself in Harry's arms, and I was sure Harry too had no intention of stealing me away from someone else. He wasn't like that, which was both a blessing and a curse, because I'd discovered I definitely liked him - in a friendly way, of course.

Shockingly enough, I liked to talk to Harry. He was fun to talk to, and I definitely shouldn't have been that surprised considering I'd literally dated him, but it was Harry and I'd always known him to like to be rather silent most of the time, so I definitely was. The truth was, I'd definitely not expected him to make the effort to talk to me once it would've been clarified that I only wanted him to model for me, and nothing else. But the day before he had, and he had also managed to make the situation less awkward, and I was so glad that I hadn't shot him down like I'd done before. I wouldn't have minded it if that was what our next sessions would've looked like - more than that, I would've also enjoyed it.