spring day.

no. 4

snowflakes are falling, and you are getting farther away
i miss you, i miss you
how much more do i have to wait?
how many more days do i have to stay up all nights?
until i can see you, until i can meet you.

🌙

every single day, jaeyeol felt further and further away from hyungseok. hearing the words 'any day now' from doctor after doctor seemed to drain the words of their meaning. if any day now was one month ago, why wasn't he awake yet?

looking at hyungseok's seemingly lifeless body was a constant reminder of just how much jaeyeol fucking missed his best friend. it's been nearly two months, and the sound of the brunette's laugh was starting to fade from his memory.

as much as jaeyeol was sick and tired of hearing the words 'any day now', he would have chosen them over the words he would hear next any day of the year.

"we aren't sure if hyungseok is going to wake up at all."

the words following were are muddled in jaeyeol's mind. his best friend, the only person who was able to understand him, might be gone? just like that?

he would say it all felt like a dream, but that isn't true. it all felt simply too real. every single one of his senses was overloaded, and he couldn't help but let the tears fall. quietly, of course, but they fell nonetheless.

jaeyeol felt so worthless. he had sworn to himself that he wouldn't cry any more over this, but god. how could he not cry?

but, he refused to give up. every day, it felt like the doctors were just trying to discourage him. the constant reminders of how poor his best friend's health was simply weren't needed. but, after all that jaeyeol had gone through, he refused to simply give up.

every day, every single day, his routine was consistent. wake up, go to school, and then go the hospital. repeat, repeat, repeat. every. single. day.

how many more days would jaeyeol have to live the same day? how many days until he could finally see hyungseok again? until he could hold him in his arms for the nth time?

how long?