To Be Different; Part One

To Be Different; Chapter 1

"What's wrong?" I ask him.

"Nothing", he answers, he holds my gaze but then looks away. "I got you something."

"Really?" I notice how quickly he changes the subject.

"Yeah, just a second," he reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a small velvet box and hands it to me. "It's just something I saw during my stay and I thought of you." I see him blush and I smile, grateful.

 Opening it, I feel how soft the outside of the blue box is. I had never gotten much of a present from Ari like this, most of the time for our friendaversaries we'd make each other a bracelet of some sort or a card. But this, this was different and though it felt special it somehow for a strange reason gave me this weird feeling he was hiding something.

Inside the box lay a necklace, silver and simple. But the pendent on it was what made me smile. Forever my friend. I love you. "Ari", I look up at him and he is smiling but the smile is different, almost forced. "It's beautiful."

"Just like you", he compliments and then takes the box away from me and taking the necklace out. "I want you to have this Cassie, you deserve it. You're the best." He lifts my long light brown hair and puts the necklace around my neck, clasping it.

I don't know what to say to him; don't know how to thank him. I look into his eyes again and see there is sadness behind the veil of fake happiness. "Thank you." I whisper.

"No, Cassie, thank you", he says back and then he holds me again, as if he never wants to let me go.

~

I find myself waking up in a white room upon a bed that's not exactly comfortable. I hear a voice, a woman's maybe. But I ignore it and look around. The room is white; walls, ceilings, floor, there is no color. I wonder where I am, why I'm here and then my eyes land on the boy with Ari's eyes. He smiles at me but I look away, refusing myself to gaze into the eyes like the ones of the friend I had lost. There's a desk in the corner, awkwardly neat and tidy, nothing on it but a pen, paper and a notebook.

There are no pictures indicating whether the person who owns this room has a family. No femininity or masculinity to help me figure out whether the person is a female or male. There is absolutely nothing here, but the boy, the unknown person and myself I have ignored.

My name is being called, Cassie, Cassie. And I look towards the spot where the voice seems to be coming from. Besides the boy, I see a woman I do not recognize nor saw when I first looked around. She smiles at me and her eyes are a mossy green, like the time Ari's was when we were younger. The thought of Ari once more makes my heart beat faster and my eyes water. But I push away the tears, not allowing my inner self show in front of these strangers.

Cassie, the woman says, I am Ms. Romaine, I nod but I don't pay attention to her, my eyes fall onto the boy again. I want to ask him who he is, want to ask him if he knew or was related to Ari in anyway but my voice will not come. It's as if there is a mute button on me and I cannot be heard. I stop trying, thinking they have drugged me or had done something to me to not allow myself to speak.

Cassie, look at me. I look back at the woman and she stares at me with patience. Like a mother, like mine. Cassie, what happened in the girls' bathroom? I shrug because I no longer remember. She is silent, and then walks to me and I flinch. She sees it and moves back, her eyes never leaving mine but her hands, I see are moving quickly making gestures I don't understand.

The boy walks to her, as if he knows what her hand movements mean. I wonder, I truly wonder what's wrong with him or at least what's wrong with me? The boy makes his hands move quickly like Ms. Romaine and then he looks at me and I close my eyes, so as not to stare into his. I hear him chuckle a reminder of Ari's laugh comes to mind and I close my eyes even tighter.

Its okay Cassie, the boy says I will not hurt you. I hear his footsteps as he comes nearer and then I feel his hand touch my arm. I jerk back and instantly his hand goes into his pocket. I'm sorry. He says to me and I see his expression shows his embarrassment. I shake my head and I get off the bed and stand. I feel myself wobble, almost fall but before I hit the ground, the boy catches me by the arm.

Are you okay? He asks me and I give him a small nod. He balances me and then lets my arm go. I stand there awkwardly in front of two strangers, in a small white room. The silence is killing me; I could never understand who thought of the word, who would waste time making up a word that meant no sound, nothing. The silence makes me small and my mind begins to play its' own music and I begin to hum.

The tune that comes to mind, that is playing for me so I could ignore the silence is one of Ari's favorite songs, Belle of the Boulevard by Dashboard Confessionals. The tune repeats over and over again and so does Ari's voice in my mind. He used to be a great singer, used to sing to me all the time. The memory of his voice brings me to think of the time when he and I were in the talent show, the time when he and I were one.

~

"It's time for a last act, Ari Simmons and Cassie Rosen!" announced Mr. Marcus, Riverview High's principal.

"We're gonna do great Cassie, don't worry," he took my hand and squeezed it, "I promise you."

I nod, but I'm frozen with fear as he leads me onto the stage and he smiles to the audience. "Ari, I can't."

"Of course you can Cassie, you did it before," he whispers to me.

"But that was only in front of you and our parents!" I feel small inside as the audience goes quiet as they wait.

"You can do it Cassie, I believe in you", he looks at the stage manager and nods and the music begins.

 "Down in a local bar out on the boulevard. The sound of an old guitar is saving you, from sinking, it's a long way down and it's a long way." He begins to sing and he looks at me waiting. The music goes on and he starts to sing again. "Back like you never broke, you tell a dirty joke. He touches your leg and he thinks he's getting close."

For now you let him, just this once just for now, and just like that it's over." I sing along with the music and soon the chorus comes upon us both.

"Don't turn away, dry your eyes, dry your eyes. Don't be afraid but keep it all inside, all inside. When you fall apart, dry your eyes, dry your eyes. Life is hard for the belle of the boulevard." We sing together and then from then on there, everything goes smoothly.

As the song ends, Ari pulls me closer to him and it's as if he's singing to me personally. "Don't turn away, dry your eyes, dry your eyes. Don't be afraid but keep it all inside, all inside. When you fall apart, dry your eyes, dry your eyes. Life is hard for the belle of the boulevard."

The song ends but he's still looking at me, holding me close. "You did great Cassie." And he kisses my cheek, making me blush not only because of the open affection but because of all the applause we were getting.

"It seems to me that the audience loves you two", Mr. Marcus hands us an envelope as we untangle ourselves from one another. "You guys have one first place!"

"Oh my god," I whisper. "Oh my god! We did it!" I scream.

Ari laughs and whispers into my ear, "No Cassie, you did it. I told you, you could."

I smile at him, "No Ari. We did it, together."

And the scene turns black.

~Written by Christina aka BeautifulWriter224

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Copyright November 9, 2010

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