soft - woosan

chapter 29

the chauffeur revved the engine, and pulled out of the driveway smoothly into the road, beginning their journey back. wooyoung reached to pull the divider shut, perhaps for privacy, and san immediately panicked at the idea.

he grabbed wooyoung's wrist, pulling it away and pursing his lips before explaining flatly; "l-leave it open."

the other didn't question him, but took the hand that was holding his wrist into his fingers, grasping it delicately.

san jolted his head to look at their entwined hands in utter panic, hating the feeling of soft skin against his own, making him feel so safe.

quick. san thought desperately to himself, trying to ignore the other's soft subtle smile. list every bad thing he's done to you. don't lose to him so easily.

let's see... he punched me.

he beat up yugyeom.

he kissed hyungwon's boyfriend knowingly.

he kissed me against my own will when i asked him to stop.

he slept with that girl and left her alone...

good. keep going.

"san?" shit shit shit, his voice was so honey smooth and authentic- "what're you thinking about?"

just his voice was enough to jumble and scatter all of san's organised thoughts, crumble his walls, seep into his heart.

he apologized. he let bambam beat him to a pulp out of regret. he explained it was an experiment and didn't continue with him. he wasn't in his right mind. he said they were both drunk and he didn't leave her immediately. no one's perfect.

"honestly?" he bit his lip anxiously,  averting his eyes guiltily. "every reason why i shouldn't be with you."

wooyoung was stunned into a shocked silence, but it didn't last long. "well i hope you thought of a lot of them." he replied, squeezing his hand briefly.

"because i can think of twice as many why you should."

san's cheeks heated once more, and he blew the dark hair obscuring his vision out of his eyes. "cocky and confident." he mumbled.

"just how you like me." wooyoung smiled fondly at him.

"bold of you to assume i still like you." san replied, voice muffled by his shirt sleeve.

the other hummed dismissively, seeing right through him. "it's clear you do or you wouldn't still be holding my hand."

san scoffed in embarrassment, withdrawing his hand from the other's grasp.

"but seriously," wooyoung started, turning to look at him directly. "i want to be with you. but not if you don't want me. i just want- i just want you to be happy."

"don't get all soft on me." san mumbled, internally gushing at his honesty. "i need to think about it."

"i thought you liked soft!" he complained aside before cutting in, "haven't you done enough thinking?"

"there is no such thing." san replied matter of factly, drawing his arms around himself and fighting off the threat of a tornado of thoughts preparing to bombard him, proof of his words.

thankfully, the rest of the drive unfolded in silenced, his mouth wired shut and unwilling to provide another word, determined to ignore any that came from wooyoung's mouth.

when they arrived back, the other was first to exit the vehicle, pointedly walking off straight away, seeming to be deep in thought, leaving san by himself to give condolence to the chauffeur.