FlashFiction Dumpground

Queen in my kitchen (true story, sort of)

Trigger warning: violence against a non-human.

***

I thought this would be an ordinary day. Boy, was I wrong.

I saw her as soon as I entered my kitchen. Her enormous presence was too much for me to bear. What was she doing here?

She turned toward me and froze.

"You!" she exclaimed.

I scanned her surroundings. She was alone. By herself she posed no threat to me. I composed myself and planted a wicked smile on my face.

"Well, look who we got here." I bowed down but kept my eyes on her. "I am honored to be in your presence. To what may I owe the honor?"

"Do not mock me!" She responded. "My entire family is dead. MURDERED!!! I came up here to investigate and found the evidence. YOU are responsible for the death of my family and YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS CRIME!"

I laughed like the cold-blooded killer that I am. "Yes. I did it. WITH PLEASURE! I used your own foragers as my Trojan Horse. They unknowingly killed your whole clan. Ha ha ha."

I wanted to stall her long enough to spot a suitable weapon. The invasion would end today. With her death.

"What do you think you can do to me?" I asked. "No matter how great or powerful you might think you are, your power won't work here."

"I beg your pardon!" Yes. She was mad now. If she were capable of it, she'd turn an angry red. "How dare you speak to me like that! I will have you know that my powers extend to much more than what you think. I will gather a new army. I will train the strongest warriors and set them upon you. Our numbers will obliterate you. I will invade your home, steal your food..."

I found a weapon within my reach. Perfect. She was too outraged to notice me picking it up.

"... You will not get away. My army will attack with a vicious strike..."

SNAP!!!

I smiled at the silence as green juices leaked from her flattened body. It was a good closure. What a relief!

"Let this be a lesson to all ant colonies thinking to get cozy in my kitchen!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. "I've got plenty of poisoned bait for all of you!"

Now, I had to wipe her unnaturally large body off my slipper. Phew. What a day...