My drug *UP FOR REVISIONS*

Our movie

"well we should get going we'll see you tomorrow harry" josh says and they leave and louis comes in.

"I know your mad at me but I don't care" I say and he closes the door sitting down at the edge of my bed "how just his after EVERYTHIng I mean they burnt down your house almost killed you told you to kill your self and made you starve your self" he says really angrily.

"They looked genially sorry and you even told me every one deserves a second chance" I say and he scoffs standing up " you don't see murderers getting second chances" he yells.

" why are you yelling at me" I say and be punches a wall "stop" I say and be just looks at me "SHUT UP JUST SHUT UP OKAY YOU JUST FORGAVE PEOPLE WHO HAVE BEEN HURTING YOU EMOTIONALLY AND PHYSICALLY FOR EVER I MEAN HOW STUPID CAN YOU FUCKING BE!" he screams at me and I get up and push him.

"get out" I say and he just stands there and I push him harder "GET THE FUCK OUT" I scream at him but he just stares at me.

"I'm not gonna sit here and let you scream at me I'm not doing it so just get the fuck out and never come back you prick" I yell and he grabs his things and leaves slamming the door and I fall I to the bed and start crying.

I want to call Niall but he needs his rest I mean it's 12:30am I just need a cuddle "I need help" I cry out and shove my face into my pillow.

I need relief

I get out of bed and head to the bathroom locking the door and look at my wrists

You've been clean for a while and your just gonna throw it all away just like that?

"Yep" I say out Loud and I pull out a secret razor and I start dragging likes down my wrist every time making sure to go deeper and deeper with every cut.

"You deserve this" I say

1 cut each wrist

"Your so stupid"

2 cuts each thigh

"You ruin everything"

4 cuts on the stomach

"You don't deserve to like this pain but you are you love the way the blade just runs across your wrist"

2 cuts each bicep

I keep cutting till I get dizzy and I hold the sink looking into my reflection and I laugh I laughs all the marks my masterpieces on my body.

"Ugh I've been wanting pain so much it feels so good" I say and laugh but my reflection doesn't "why do you do this To us" he says "cause we deserve this" I say and he laughs at me "no you are just being really stupid" he says.

"Shut up" I say but his laughter get louder and louder and I punch the mirror with both hands and clasp on the floor bleeding out "do I want help" I mutter to myself.

I decide to open the door and crawl over to the door but only making t half say getting too weak to go and I hear my phone ring and I take all my energy to get to it and see it's Niall.

"Harry how you feeling" he says and I try to get words out but only "ni.....help....need" "hary what's wrong" he says panicking "cut...much blood" I breath out and black out.

(Louis p.o.v.)

I've been in the gift shop trying to pick it something great for Harry cause I feel like complete shit "that will be 23£" the lady says and I give her the money and head up to Harry's room.

I get to his floor and I start walking to his room and dr. smith walks out of his room "hey doctor" I say and she stops me "Louis do you know" she says giving me a look.

I don't like it

"Know what" I say and she looks down and up again "he...he cut a lot and some of hem were really deep he punched his mirror with both hands and he bleed out" she says.

" is he okay" I say my voice cracking "sort of" she says "why don't you sit she says so I sit on a chair.

"See his body is doing a little better we stopped the bleeding but....he wont wake up for a good month" she says.

"Can I see him" I say and when she nods I run into his room and close the door and my heart drops when I see his lifeless body on he bed.

His skin is very pale his arms are all covered up and I start to cry setting every thing down and standing next to him and I grab his hand and kiss it.

"I'm so sorry......this is all my fault I wish I knew how to control my anger I-I didn't think you would cut again I didn't know I would cause this I never wanted to cause this all I wanted was to make you happy I never wanted to be the reason that you cut again.....if it makes you feel better I will try to forgive josh and Logan I will do anything for you I need you I love you so much I need you.......your my drug like pain is your well your mine" I say sobbing.

"I got you bamboo and a stuffed panda I don't know what your favorite animal is so i'll buy as many stuffed animals until I get you the right one" I say kissing his hand again.

I sit there staring at him and I hear the door close and Niall and Zayn are standing there "Niall I'm sorry" I say crying still and he runs up to me and hugs me.

"don't be please" he says sobbing and I hold him on my lap as we both cry and Zayn rubbing our back I guess trying to stay strong.

"We bought you flowers" Niall says to Harry placing his hand ontop of his and I'm still holding Harry's hand and Niall on my lap as we handle our crying.

"We're here were here" Liam and Joseph say running into the room looking exhausted and they have 2 cards and some flowers they set them down and walk over to Harry.

"This is all my fault" I whisper and Niall kisses my head "lets not talk about it right now okay" he says and I nod just staring at Harry.

(Harry's p.o.v.)

I'm staring at my body laying on a bed "what's happening why can't they hear or see me" I ask my self "it's

Called an out of body experience hazza" a sweet voice says.

I turn around and see my mum "mum" I say walking over to her hugging her "hi hazza" she says and I pull away "what's happening" I say and she smiles rubbing her thumb across my cheek.

"You cut too deep and too much hazza, you lost alot of blood and now your here" she says "wait I'm dead" I say l

Panicking "no no your just ha sing an oh of body experience" she says.

"What does that mean" I ask her "when your body is healing your stuck here until your strong enough to go back" she says and I look back at them and back to my mum.

" I'm scared WHA if I don't get strong enough" I say and she laughs "Harry you will I promise" she says grabbing my hand "I have to go back to watch over people but i'll be back tomorrow" and says.

"it was nice seeing you mum I miss you" I say and she kisses my head and hands me a flower crown "I miss you too" she says and a bright light then she's gone and I put the crown on.

I sit down next to Louis and Niall and start crying my self Louis pUTING this all on him and I hate it I love Louis so much I hate seeing this.

I just want to tell him I want to touch him but I can't I want him Niall Zayn Liam every one but once again I can't.

"I love you" I say placing my hand over theirs but it just falling through " I love you so much" Louis says kissing my body's hand and I feel the warmth and smile cause at least I can feel he's here.